Going Forward

[threebikesmcginty]

I sat in a meeting yesterday from about 9 until 2:30, I lost count of the amount of times I heard those dreaded words 'going forward' - what's the matter with these people?

 

[swee'pea99]

They have issues.

 

[beanzontoast]

How were they using it?

 

[Fnaar]

Why not play "Cliche Bigo". Make a bingo card of typical meeting cliches, then cross them off as they come up. Can be played surreptitously with colleagues, as long as you don't stand up and shout "housey housey!" when you win!

 

[threebikesmcginty]

Why not play "Cliche Bigo". Make a bingo card of typical meeting cliches, then cross them off as they come up. Can be played surreptitously with colleagues, as long as you don't stand up and shout "housey housey!" when you win!

I could fill a book in minutes!

 

[Norm]

I love meetings like that. Personal favourite is "we are where we are".

When all is said and done, everything is said and nothing is done. etc

 

[XmisterIS]

Oh yeah ... we called that one "bulls*** bingo".

"Going forward" is one of those phrases that just irks me.

I put it in the same category as phrases like:

"Blue-sky thinking" (We're not going to get very far if we all sit round thinking about the sky ...)

"Boiler-plate solution" (I still have absolutely no idea what that means!)

"Striving for excellence" (OK - so you're not excellent then?)

"People-focussed" (as opposed to ... water-cooler focussed? WTF?!!)

"There's no 'I' in 'team'" (Well done, you can spell!)

"At this moment in time" (Why not just say "at the moment"?)

"Streamlining" (Oh I see, people aren't going to be sacked, they're going to be "streamlined". Nice.)

etc, etc, etc ...

 

[BrumJim]

"Thinking out of the box", which always means "You have to start thinking in my box".

When anyone in a presentation splits an infinitive, it is always in a self-righteous and totally irrelevant manner. If you are going to split infinitives, then endeavour to properly do it.

 

[Norm]

"There's no 'I' in 'team'" (Well done, you can spell!)

Yeah, but you can make "at me" out of it.

 

[Greedo]

All that pish was one of the key motivators in me getting out of that kind of environment. The amount of times I heard that kind of shite was starting to drive me insane, clients, colleagues, bosses they were all at it with

Moving forward
Thinking out side the box
streamlining
infrastructres
Ballpark figures (we live in the UK)
Blue sky thinking
End to end
Pro active
push back
low hanging fruit (sales pricks love this term)

I could go on all day. It's always interesting though that everysingle person who talked like this I met were shite at there jobs, wheras the rest who just got on with it and didn't want to sit about in meetings about meeting all day were good at theirs!


I was standing behind a guy on his phone in a shop at Christmas at the till and he was a right tw*t. He actually said without a hint of humour or sarcasm in his voice

"yeah told him we will just set about attacking their infrastrucure and see what poso's and nego's we uncover"

 

[wafflycat]

"stakeholders"

I get the urge to grab the head of anyone uttering that word and thwaping their head repeatedly off the desk in front.

Of course, you can always play ***this game*** at meetings. Much more fun.
Alas link most likely NOT WORK SAFE.

 

[fossyant]

It's all bollox ? Onwards and upwards.......

 

[philipbh]

I sat in a meeting yesterday from about 9 until 2:30, I lost count of the amount of times I heard those dreaded words 'going forward' - what's the matter with these people?

Going forward, Mrs BH is going to be "Colleague Engagement Champion" at her workhouse

 

[telesonic99]

I probably say "What would Jesus do ?" too much for everyone's liking.

 

[just jim]

I heard "The elephant in the room" again on the radio this morning. Why God why?