Honorable Mentions

[ACS]

For no other reason that I have had the mother of all mornings I thought a few honorable mentions had to be made:

To the bus driver who forced me into a ditch this morning: Damm your eyes.

To the lady in the 4x4 who stopped to make sure that I was still alive: Bless you, even if your dog tried to escape in an attempt to rip me to shreads.

To Ron, one my staff, who set the workshop on fire: For f***s sake Ron !!!.

To the bin man who ran out in front of me forcing me onto the pavement and into a wall: Is your bonus really more important than my life?

and finally (for now anyway)the police officer who stopped me for excessive speed riding past a school; Thanks for making my day, me speeding, recorded at over 20MPH on my MTB, top class, have not stopped smiling. Got a polite warning and a smile.


Please add your honorable mentions its very cathartic

 

[Kirstie]

I have one. It's the computer bod, somewhere on the planet, who is responsible for the systems failure which has crashed our intranet today, and apparently the systems of other UK universities too. I can't get to my files, or email, or anything. You have made my day simultaneously better and worse. Well done

 

[cookiemonster]

To the dickheads at Student Finance who have just told me this morning that they have LOST the paperwork, which they've had since 18th April, for my Student loans and grants. So I've got to go through the whole process again therefore leaving me completely skint here in Finland. :?:B)B)

My language this morning was not pretty.

 

[Mr Phoebus]

Dear Cooking Fat...
Power rubbing my shins will only make me laugh so much that I can't tear you a food pouch open.
Thus delaying your scoff.
"Desist" I say!

 

[Crackle]

To the bus driver who was kind enough to drive close enough for me to scrawl my name on the side of his bus with my finger and then allowed me to test my brakes just 10 yards later - Thank you

 

[domtyler]

You are all a bunch of Victor Meldrews! Pull yourselves to together and get a life for heavens sake!

 

[Mr Phoebus]

Damm your eyes.

I think that's a blocked tear duct.

 

[ACS]

I think that's a blocked tear duct.

 

[ACS]

You are all a bunch of Victor Meldrews! Pull yourselves to together and get a life for heavens sake!

I get the feeling that you spend most of your time smiling on the inside.

 

[domtyler]

I get the feeling that you spend most of your time smiling on the inside.

Poppycock

 

[ACS]

Poppycock

From the dutch for dung I believe, fine retort considering your initial comment was based on a fictional character and two empty clichés. No doubt you will wish to comment further lets hope your reply will be full of original wit and wisdom

Regards

 

[papercorn2000]

On that subject... The word dishevelled; there's a good case to be made that the opposite is shevelled. Therefore if someone looks particularly smart, they could say to be "shevelled". If you want someone to tidy themselves up, you tell them shevell themselves...

 

[Landslide]

To my lunchtime darts opponent for losing 7-1, but avoiding a tin-hat along the way. I would say well done, but you were rubbish!

 

[Maz]

the police officer who stopped me for excessive speed riding past a school; Thanks for making my day, me speeding, recorded at over 20MPH on my MTB, top class, have not stopped smiling. Got a polite warning and a smile.

That's nothing to be proud of, I'm afraid. You should slow down when riding past schools.

 

[ACS]

That's nothing to be proud of, I'm afraid. You should slow down when riding past schools.

I agree with you without reservation and have purchased a cycling computer this afternoon. I am in no way defending myself I did break the law and took the advice provided. If the Officer concerned had elected to adopt a more formal approach then I would have accepted his decision without adverse comment and accepted any remedy in law that may have followed. However, smiling about it not yet a criminal offence.