Estate Agency Descriptions...

[SavageHoutkop]

Gotta love em.

"three peace bathroom suit"

 

[vernon]

It might be an an outside toilet and very peaceful.

 

[vernon]

It's not a mis-description though it just a reflection of the poor standards of literacy that currently exist. Hardly surprising when potential trainee English teachers at interview say things like:

'I've not read a whole book I only read the extracts needed for my assessments'
'I don't do plays'
'Spelling isn't that important if the meaning is clear'

and then proceed to be admitted for a training place.

 

[gaz]

I work for an estate agency, the stuff I see go on the websites can be quite humours.
Especially when you see pictures of the water pump and the rock pile made from the making of the swimming pool.

 

[SavageHoutkop]

One of my pet hates is when there are no pictures. But then, sometimes, you see a picture and think "that picture did more harm than good" you do wonder why they put them in!

 

[darth vadar]

I got some house details from an Estate Agent recently which described the bathroom as having a "shite" coloured suite.

Oops!!!!

 

[BigonaBianchi]

"Stunning river river views"

...between the gas works and the timber port docks...it's that bit there..see it...the brown bit...but it's not really a river...more of a harbour...

 

[Mad at urage]

I work for an estate agency, the stuff I see go on the websites can be quite humours.
Especially when you see pictures of the water pump and the rock pile made from the making of the swimming pool.

I'll bet it is humourous, if the standard of proof reading here is anything to go by.

Just finished finding a house, two years searching. The descriptions the agents give have been unbelievable (literally as well as figuratively), as for the pictures: If the prospective buyer walks into the house having been attracted by the picture and says "Oh dear" (or words to that effect), they won't buy; if they walk into the house having seen pictures and say "that looks better than it did on the site", then they might. Estate agents don't (generally) understand their purchasors (IME).

As for the directions given: "At the T junction go straight on" is the least of it, I just wish they'd learn left from right and that the top of the hill is where it stops going up!

Edit - add smiley (sorry gaz)

 

[SavageHoutkop]

"At the T junction go straight on"

like the 'I was following the Satnav' excuse?

 

[Mad at urage]

Nope, as in they don't understand the difference between a T junction and a Cross-roads (they - this was a recurring theme from several agencies).

 

[Brains]

My 3 bed des res terr. hse,with river views (from the roof only)
In highly desirable road opposite (the local infants) school catchment area (which means impossible to even cycle up the road at school start and end times, mad mothers in 4x4's trying to do 3 point turns)
Extensive (30') mature garden extents to the local park (thieving scallies scaling the rear wall to 'get back our ball')
Neighbours include (a two well known musicians) (one who has roadies delivering equipment day and night and the other) famous for his parties (that go on all night)
Price ? If you need to ask, you can't afford it. it's inner London.

 

[deptfordmarmoset]

My 3 bed des res terr. hse,with river views (from the roof only)
In highly desirable road opposite (the local infants) school catchment area (which means impossible to even cycle up the road at school start and end times, mad mothers in 4x4's trying to do 3 point turns)
Extensive (30') mature garden extents to the local park (thieving scallies scaling the rear wall to 'get back our ball')
Neighbours include (a two well known musicians) (one who has roadies delivering equipment day and night and the other) famous for his parties (that go on all night)
Price ? If you need to ask, you can't afford it. it's inner London.

Estate agents and property developers around here spell Deptford G-r-e-e-n-w-i-c-h.

 

[gaz]

Edit - add smiley (sorry gaz)

No worries, I'm dyslexic so i have an excuse

 

[Night Train]

I was lucky with my house.
I only saw the photo of it, on a board on its own next to the board with flats for sale, priced in the same range as the flats.
I asked, it was a 7 bed Victorian house converted to 4 flats in the 70s complete with architects drawings.

Following a drive past to check the area I put in an offer and it was accepted.
Never saw the description.

 

[gaz]

I recall a house that the firm I work for was marketing, it sold to an overseas buyer who only saw it on the internet, they never visited it before purchasing.