It's just grown four inches!!!!

[zimzum42]

So, you used Phostrogen then?

Like Adrian Mole - Grow It Big cream...

 

[TVC]

Do you know of anything that raises the dead?

 

[zimzum42]

Necrophilia?

 

[ASC1951]

My wife suggested that my climbing french beans weren't doing very well, so I've been marking the canes with a pencil each evening to check the growth rate.

Only one of my first dozen seed beans survived, so I'm having to start with a second lot from pots like sensible people do in the first place.

Foliar spray them with very dilute cowshit, Patrick, that will have them racing away.

 

[Crankarm]

How long is your giant cucumber? Will it win Best in Show again this year ?

 

[Kirstie]

What about your melons?

Not in one go. They're huge.

 

[ComedyPilot]

Not in one go. They're huge.

If you ever need a hand with them....ahem