My chances of getting home on time?

[Panter]

As I've managed to leave my mobile at home.
Plus, for some reason, the pump isn't strapped to the frame as it should be? I must've taken it off to clean the bike and left it at home.
Oh, and they've cut the hawthorn hedges on the lanes that I ride through and my rear tyre has lots of large splits in it.

Methinks the fairy is watching and rubbing her hands...

 

[Moodyman]

Take an alternative route - she'll be left waiting in vain

 

[CopperBrompton]

Or make a fake pump by using felt-tip pen to colour-in a cardboard tube and fit that to the bike to fool her.

 

[Sam Kennedy]

If the worst comes to the worst, remember you can stuff your tyre with grass and roll home slowly, much better than walking and pushing a bike!

 

[Theseus]

If the worst comes to the worst, remember you can stuff your tyre with grass and roll home slowly, much better than walking and pushing a bike!

There will be all those handy Hawthorn clippings he can use.

 

[Peter10]

Some of these ideas sound like plots to Macgyver to me.

 

[Matty]

Some of these ideas sound like plots to Macgyver to me.

Nah, that'd need an orange.

 

[BSRU]

Can you no swap the front and back tyres then wheelie all the way home?

 

[Matthames]

Can you no swap the front and back tyres then wheelie all the way home?

How is he going to swap the tyres without deflating them?

 

[Panter]

Thanks all, some sage advice here.

Should be Ok now.

Fake pump from coloured in loo roll? check.
Gloves for stuffing Hawthorn into tyre? check.
Map for alternative routes? check.
Wheelie skilz? hmmmm, ongoing.
Orange? check.

Wish me luck...

 

[BSRU]

How is he going to swap the tyres without deflating them?

With great skill us mere mortals can never comprehend.

 

[jonny jeez]

If the worst comes to the worst, remember you can stuff your tyre with grass and roll home slowly, much better than walking and pushing a bike!

are you a part time drug dealer by chance?

 

[davefb]

nice excuse to buy some new bits though, isnt it

 

[skudupnorth]

Whats a puncture ???

 

[Bman]

are you a part time drug dealer by chance?

They would never think to look there!