...ok, not so much an ode, more a...transcript of what I said during a commute....ok, not even that, my camera didn't record, so it is a memory of roughly what I said during last nights commute home. I'm not mad, I thought it might be on video and would be quite funny.....ok I am mad! 
Picture the scene.... Bl**dy strong headwind, driving, stinging rain/sleet/snow and my hilly route home (avoiding the muppets). There is some actual dialog, you just need to keep reading....
Magnatom hits the first really big hill
...aaaarrrrrrrrggghhh,, humfff, eeeerrrrgh, arrrrrgghhhhh, puff, pant, puff, pant (puff pants continue for the rest of the journey. No point in making this post take up a whole computer screen)....eeeeeeeeghhhh, oooochhhhh...
magnatom summits
aaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh
The road undulates and takes Magnatom to the next big 17% er.
Uuugh!
...aaaarrrrrrrrggghhh,, humfff, eeeerrrrgh, arrrrrgghhhhh, puff, pant, puff, pant....eeeeeeeeghhhh, oooochhhhh...
magnatom summits
eeeeeeaaaaaaahhhhhh........
The driving rain/sleet/snow starts to sting
ouch, awwww, uhhgggg, aaooowww, that ^%&% hurts...
What am I doing!? aooowwww!Ouch, awwww, uhhgggg, aaooowww
Magnatom reaches the highest point on his commute home. As he starts to descend, he realises that he needs to pedal hard to keep going
This is downhill.....it's bl**dy downhill, it doesn't feel like downhill...ouch...bu%%er!
Then Magnatom has a moment of revelation. No, the clouds don't part, angels don't start singing, he just realises that for some strange and unexplained reason despite all the pain and all the discomfort....he's having fun!
Hee, hee, heeee! This is mad. Totally mad. But for some reason, it's fun. I'm feeling wet, sore, exhausted, tired and weary, but, it's kinda fun....ouch.... Why? Mmmm. I just feel kinda...actually, that's it! I feel. I am feeling. I am feeling lots. Sure most of the feeling isn't fun feeling, but it's a damn site better than not feeling....being stuck in a car, feeling....not much, listening to drivel on the radio, stuck in traffic. No way! Instead, here I am outside, feeling the weather, feeling the rain, feeling the wind, moving under my own power, battling the elements....brilliant.
I'll get home feeling like my commute was an event, ouch... a challenge....a victory! I did that ride, in that weather and I didn't stop despite my muscles and pain receptors telling me....you're mad!!! Please stop!!!
Magnatom turns the last corner for home... a steepish downhill section that is just about the only part of his commute that, on this occasion, has a tailwind....
Weeeeeeeeeee!
Yes last nights commute home was epic. I had to dump most of my soaking wet gear in the garage before I dare enter the house. My legs felt like I had done a hard 60 miler (not 11.5miles) and my face fely like it had been pricked with a thousand needles, but my wife would tell you how big my grin was.
Now, how do I explain this to non-cyclists!
Picture the scene.... Bl**dy strong headwind, driving, stinging rain/sleet/snow and my hilly route home (avoiding the muppets). There is some actual dialog, you just need to keep reading....
Magnatom hits the first really big hill
...aaaarrrrrrrrggghhh,, humfff, eeeerrrrgh, arrrrrgghhhhh, puff, pant, puff, pant (puff pants continue for the rest of the journey. No point in making this post take up a whole computer screen)....eeeeeeeeghhhh, oooochhhhh...
magnatom summits
aaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh
The road undulates and takes Magnatom to the next big 17% er.
Uuugh!
...aaaarrrrrrrrggghhh,, humfff, eeeerrrrgh, arrrrrgghhhhh, puff, pant, puff, pant....eeeeeeeeghhhh, oooochhhhh...
magnatom summits
eeeeeeaaaaaaahhhhhh........
The driving rain/sleet/snow starts to sting
ouch, awwww, uhhgggg, aaooowww, that ^%&% hurts...
What am I doing!? aooowwww!Ouch, awwww, uhhgggg, aaooowww
Magnatom reaches the highest point on his commute home. As he starts to descend, he realises that he needs to pedal hard to keep going
This is downhill.....it's bl**dy downhill, it doesn't feel like downhill...ouch...bu%%er!
Then Magnatom has a moment of revelation. No, the clouds don't part, angels don't start singing, he just realises that for some strange and unexplained reason despite all the pain and all the discomfort....he's having fun!
Hee, hee, heeee! This is mad. Totally mad. But for some reason, it's fun. I'm feeling wet, sore, exhausted, tired and weary, but, it's kinda fun....ouch.... Why? Mmmm. I just feel kinda...actually, that's it! I feel. I am feeling. I am feeling lots. Sure most of the feeling isn't fun feeling, but it's a damn site better than not feeling....being stuck in a car, feeling....not much, listening to drivel on the radio, stuck in traffic. No way! Instead, here I am outside, feeling the weather, feeling the rain, feeling the wind, moving under my own power, battling the elements....brilliant.
I'll get home feeling like my commute was an event, ouch... a challenge....a victory! I did that ride, in that weather and I didn't stop despite my muscles and pain receptors telling me....you're mad!!! Please stop!!!
Magnatom turns the last corner for home... a steepish downhill section that is just about the only part of his commute that, on this occasion, has a tailwind....
Weeeeeeeeeee!
Yes last nights commute home was epic. I had to dump most of my soaking wet gear in the garage before I dare enter the house. My legs felt like I had done a hard 60 miler (not 11.5miles) and my face fely like it had been pricked with a thousand needles, but my wife would tell you how big my grin was.
Now, how do I explain this to non-cyclists!
