Today I slowly murdered a ...

[rich p]

...woodlice.
The little fecker got accidentally interfaced with my paint brush up a ladder. It became accidentally whitewashed and got flicked in an arc onto a piece of roof out of my reach. I then watched the plucky, white, weathershielded little chap slowly right himself and attempt to walk only to expire about 30 minutes later.
His little lgs stopped wiggling so I suppose he could have just been having a long nap.
A sad tale.

 

[ianrauk]

Life's tough sometimes,,,

 

[Beebo]

That made me quite sad.

 

[threebikesmcginty]

A gloss finish...

 

[vernon]

Slowly murdered a woodlice?

Did the woodlouse have multiple personalities?

 

[rich p]

Slowly murdered a woodlice?

Did the woodlouse have multiple personalities?

Tomorrow I will slowly murder a pie-eating pedant

 

[rich p]

A gloss finish...

Matt G(l)oss?

 

[Spinney]

Never mind the pathos of the tale, and the fact that the poor wee chappie (or chapess) doesn't need the woodlice equivalent of a ghost bike cos he/she is already white, Vernon has to pick up an a minor typo in the OP.

 

[Beebo]

I think murdered is a bit harsh, as I doubt it was a premeditated act.

 

[vernon]

Tomorrow I will slowly murder a pie-eating pedant

Vernon has to pick up an a minor typo in the OP.

A typo is a spelling mistake - woodlouce, woodloude wooflouse would be typos. Woodlice instead of woodlouse is not a typo.

 

[Sara_H]

Don't worry. He was probably just playing dead until you'd gone.

He's probably down the woodlouse pub now, with his woodlouse mates regaling them all with the tale of his near miss. Tomorrow all the little woodlouses (that one's for you @vernon) will be extra careful near men with paintbrushes, on account of how woodlouse Pete once nearly got painted to death.

 

[vernon]

Don't worry. He was probably just playing dead until you'd gone.

He's probably down the woodlouse pub now, with his woodlouse mates regaling them all with the tale of his near miss. Tomorrow all the little woodlouses (that one's for you @vernon) will be extra careful near men with paintbrushes, on account of how woodlouse Pete once nearly got painted to death.

I'm coming over to your hice to have words about pedantry.

Why am I typing in Prince Charles' accent?

 

[biggs682]

i alway give any i find in the house a swimming lesson in the loo

 

[biggs682]

i alway give any i find in the house a swimming lesson in the loo

without a towel

 

[Spinney]

A typo is a spelling mistake - woodlouce, woodloude wooflouse would be typos. Woodlice instead of woodlouse is not a typo.

It's a multi-typo - i instead of ou....