Your best ever prank?

[XmisterIS]

There are some veritable wheezes posted here!

The best prank that was ever played on me was by two of my flatmates in my first year at Uni when we were in University accommodation.

Mobile phones had only just started to become cheap enough to become popular and I didn't know that one of my flatmates had just bought one.

I came home, thought there was noone else in the flat, sat down for lunch - and the communal lane-line phone rang. So I stopped, walked over to it, and just as I was about to pick it up it rang off. I shrugged and sat back down for lunch. It rang again. Then it rang off again just as I was about to pick it up. This happened about ten times in a row to the point where I was seriously spooked - I was convinced there was a ghost in the flat, I was absolutely sh1tting myself ... then I heard raucous laughter from my mate's room - him and one of my other flatmates had been hiding in there with the new mobile, orchestrating the whole thing with a sneaky view of the landline phone. Bastards.

 

[PBancroft]

There are some veritable wheezes posted here!

The best prank that was ever played on me was by two of my flatmates in my first year at Uni when we were in University accommodation.

Mobile phones had only just started to become cheap enough to become popular and I didn't know that one of my flatmates had just bought one.

I came home, thought there was noone else in the flat, sat down for lunch - and the communal lane-line phone rang. So I stopped, walked over to it, and just as I was about to pick it up it rang off. I shrugged and sat back down for lunch. It rang again. Then it rang off again just as I was about to pick it up. This happened about ten times in a row to the point where I was seriously spooked - I was convinced there was a ghost in the flat, I was absolutely sh1tting myself ... then I heard raucous laughter from my mate's room - him and one of my other flatmates had been hiding in there with the new mobile, orchestrating the whole thing with a sneaky view of the landline phone. Bastards.

Haha!

On a similar vein, when mobiles first became popular a friend of mine programmed all the local payphones into his. Being youngish lads, most of us couldn't afford mobiles at the time as they were so expensive so when we called him we'd use a public phone. Invariably he'd know exactly where we were and would turn up to meet us, often before the call had even finished.

It took us ages to figure out what he'd done.

 

[mog35]

I remember a prank we used to do when I worked for BT many years ago. When you phone 100 for the operator, the first thing you'll hear them say will be something like 'operator service, mog35 speaking. Can I help you?'

However, this is pre-recorded, and will play back every time you get a new call, in order to save you having to say it over and over again every day.

When you went for a quick comfort break, you'd leave your workstation in 'not ready', a kind of standby mode that saved you the bother of having to log out and back in every time you got up.

The trouble was, when someone left their console in 'not ready', their more mischievous colleagues could access their settings and fiddle with things, including their pre-recorded salutation.

Quite a few people called up and heard things like 'operator service, Dark Lord speaking' before the operator concerned twigged.

Putting blu-tack over the mouthpiece of headsets was also a favourite, as was concealing a piece of cardboard in the headphone

 

[TVC]

Putting blu-tack over the mouthpiece of headsets was also a favourite, as was concealing a piece of cardboard in the headphone

I'd forgotten all about this. In the days before publishing software our marketing department used to lay up brochures by hand, and use 'invisible tape', thin sellotape that didn't show up on photocopies. So we used to nick this stuff and either stick it over the mouth or earpieces of the victims phone to ensure conversations were almost completely one way.

 

[ventoux50]

As a young DC in a busy city centre CID office, I used to get really p'd off (along with a few colleagues) with a DS who insisted on smoking panatella cigars ALL THE BLOODY TIME ! in the car, in the office, in the bog . . . . . . so one day I bought a packet of exploding caps that you insert in the end of a cigarette/cigar the vicitm lights up and a few seconds later - BANG !

So we doctored one of his half smoked cigars and sure enough got the expected bang and a round of F**** as you would expect.

Said DS was a right smug git though (picture Gene Hunt) and dared any of us to try it again claiming he was wise to it now and we'd no chance.

A week or so later, we picked the lock on his desk drawer and found a new box of his panatellas - all individually wrapped in cellophane.

Bugger.

However, with a little deft slitting with a stanley knife a very neat cut was made in the end and 6 bangers were inserted deep into the cigar. The cellophane was essentially untouched, it was replaced in the box, in the drawer and the drawer was locked.

The whole office was in on the prank, and a few hours later the 'treated' cigar was unwrapped by a very cocky DS who was just on his way down the corridor for a meeting with the Detective Superintendent.

As he turned the corner in to the corridor he lit the cigar . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

a few moments later there was a really massive explosion and a proliferation of expletives that would make a docker blush . . . . . . . . . . . . .

seconds later he stormed back into the office still effing and jeffing, looking like a caricature - cigar still hanging from his mouth, but with the end ripped apart - still with curls of smoke rising from the tip.

needless to say we all fell about and ended up crying with laughter.

It didn't stop the bugger smoking though !

I'm giggling now as I'm typing this remembering the look on his face !

 

[ventoux50]

Oh - and another;

one of the DC's really loved his car - a Rover SD1, what a boring git he was, constantly boasting about how fast it was, how he could do 'power slides' on the way home, how many horse power it had, how big his d*** was - you get the picture ?

So one day, I sneaked up on the thing in the nick garage and slipped a little device from the local joke shop up the exhaust pipe . . . .

a metal 'whistle' with special flanges to stop it getting blown out,

sure enough at the end of the shift he slipped into the 'beast' and started her up, gunning the engine much more than was strictly necessary and intending to impress us as we got into our renault 5's, ford escorts etc.

Suddenly there was a high pitched whistle sounding like a manic Roger Whitaker or a blackbird on speed bouncing round the garage . . . .

he got out of the car in a right flap running from front to back and round in circles trying to find the problem,

It was still whistling 3 days later when he took it to have a new exhaust fitted !

 

[Gerry Attrick]

When I was an engineering student, (a few centuries back now), our group had the pleasure(?) of the company of one of those unpleasant loud-mouthed know-it-alls who had a simple solution for all mechanical and electrical ills. The fact that any number of very bright scholars had applied their joint knowledge to a specific problem was irrelevent to said pillock who always knew better.

So we naturally had to set said pillock a test.

He was a rider of a motorcycle, the fastest motorcycle on planet Earth (according to he) which not only was the fastest, best handling, most reliable and most desirable motorcycle, it was owned by said pillock.

The motorcycle in question was a BSA Bantam D7. A snorting, evil beast of some 175cc capacity and around 17 brake horse power. Wow, he could reach 60 mph from a standing start in as little as ... well he actually struggled to reach 60 mph!

So how to bring our resident pillock to book?

An ordinary lead pencil, that's how. A simple application of a softish lead pencil line from the ht terminal at the top of the spark plug to the body was all it took.

It's amazing what a crowd could build up around a "star" rider when his invincible mount refused to ignite its juice. Not that we laughed at him. Oh no!

 

[vernon]

A couple.

Making beds with a new student nurse - place a pool of melted chocolate in the patient's bed so it looks like diarhoea then diagnosing the patient's diabetes from the taste.

A related one that I used to perform when I taught science:

I would tell the pupils that sugar can be detected in urine when the owner of the urine was a diabetic. The kids could relate to this as some of them had noticed the sugary smell in their urine after eating Sugar Puffs though I hastened to tell them that this particular instance was not an indicator of diabetes.

I'd then go into the prep room and come out with a beaker of diluted tea, tell them it was a urine sample and I was going to test for sugar content by taste to gasps of disbelief.

I used the time honoured trick of dipping a finger in and placing a different one in my mouth. That would discomfort some kids. I'd usually be asked to do it again and I'd repeat the 'trick' slowly enough for someone to twig that I'd faked it and then I'd deliver the piece de resistance....

To overegg the pudding I'd take a mouthful of 'urine', gargle with it and perform a large theatrical swallow and watch kids retch, turn green and almost pass out.

 

[Brains]

Cling film over the loo is an old an favourite.

Boys get caught out for a few seconds, girls however can get caught out totally.

 

[Brains]

Many many moons a go, working as a 'Telex Op' in the City, we had a director who was one of the old school, he must have been born in the late 1800's as so I'd guess was in his 80's. He was the last person I ever saw that still wore a bowler hat on a daily basis. He also always carried a furled black umbrella every day of the week winter and summer.

One day we filled the said umbrella with 'telex chaff' the millions of little paper punch outs from the telex tape. For days he took his loaded umbrella back and forth, until one days at least two weeks later he was leaving the office with a very well known Greek shipping magnate, the inevitable happened, as he opened the umbrella over the both of them they were covered in a snowstorm of white confetti.

He was such a gentleman that he never mentioned it, it did however end up in the autobiography of the ship owner.

 

[The Jogger]

When I was about nineteen, I drove up beside a cyclist on the Wandsworth Bridge Road and got my mate in the passenger seat to lean out the window of my van and knick his hat. Very shortly after that we got into traffic and had to escape via the side roads. I'd love to have seen the face of the cyclist as his hat left his head, 1978 just in case anyone remembers it happening to them. Not a good place to admit something like that

One evening as my friend arrived home from the pub, I crumbled an oxo cube into some tobacco and rizlas as he sat and waited with great anticipation of how his head would soon be buzzing. I carefully rolled the joint (beef or chicken) and watched as he lit it up, inhaling deeply and listened to him tell me how magic it was, it would have been bloody magic if he had of got a hit from that, 1979

 

[TVC]

See here:

https://www.cyclechat.net/

 

[guitarpete247]

One evening as my friend arrived home from the pub, I crumbled an oxo cube into some tobacco and rizlas as he sat and waited with great anticipation of how his head would soon be buzzing. I carefully rolled the joint (beef or chicken) and watched as he lit it up, inhaling deeply and listened to him tell me how magic it was, it would have been bloody magic if he had of got a hit from that, 1979

On a night out in Cardiff, with some college mates, one of the girls asked my mate if she could bum a fag. He said he only had the one but he'd share it with her. After a few exchanges of the Benson & Hedges another girl also asked for a drag. It was duly passed to her who inhaled long and deep and held it in, smiling as she did and exhaled with a sweet moan. As I started to smirk at her she looked at me and said "Hasn't your mother told you about this kind of thing". The three of roled around in fits of laughter at her and she never knew why.

A mate got the nickname Twocan. as he always went to a party with two cans and walked through the house with his beer. He went to the kitchen and when no-one was looking he put them outside and then drank everyone elses beer and retieved his upon leaving. I told this story to my younger brother. He saw Twocan going to a friend's house late one night. My brother and his mate waited out on the street for a few minutes then went round the back, retrievd the beer and drank it on their way home. I'd have loved to have seen the look on his face when he went back for his beer.

Up in Sunderland, where I did my degree in the late 70's we had a smug, self rightous Christian who was always better than the rest of us, even when he drank so much in the pub one night he threw up in the corner of the back room and blamed it on some one else. When we got back to our student house he went to his room and was praying for our salvation a couple of us decided he had gone too far. We spent an hour or so going round the rooms gaffa taping the door handles of everyones room so that it was difficult to open the door. I say everyone. That was everyone except the Christian we left his un-taped so that the first person to manage to get out of his Locked dor would see everyone bar one was in the same predicament nand would work out wo had done it. HEEE HEEE HEEEEEEEEE .

 

[Cubist]

When I was an engineering student, (a few centuries back now), our group had the pleasure(?) of the company of one of those unpleasant loud-mouthed know-it-alls who had a simple solution for all mechanical and electrical ills. The fact that any number of very bright scholars had applied their joint knowledge to a specific problem was irrelevent to said pillock who always knew better.

So we naturally had to set said pillock a test.

He was a rider of a motorcycle, the fastest motorcycle on planet Earth (according to he) which not only was the fastest, best handling, most reliable and most desirable motorcycle, it was owned by said pillock.

The motorcycle in question was a BSA Bantam D7. A snorting, evil beast of some 175cc capacity and around 17 brake horse power. Wow, he could reach 60 mph from a standing start in as little as ... well he actually struggled to reach 60 mph!

So how to bring our resident pillock to book?

An ordinary lead pencil, that's how. A simple application of a softish lead pencil line from the ht terminal at the top of the spark plug to the body was all it took.

It's amazing what a crowd could build up around a "star" rider when his invincible mount refused to ignite its juice. Not that we laughed at him. Oh no!

I once spilled a tin of black gloss paint on the garage floor and didn't have time to clean it up before I went to work. When I got back home it had dried into a thick shiny puddle, which I was able to peel up off the garage floor.

One of the divisional traffic motorcyclists was a complete dick, so I popped it underneath the engine of his brand-spanking Pan-euro. About ten minutes after briefing he finally finished getting all his gear on and went down to the garage. He reappeared about thirty seconds later and got straight on the phone to the garage unit, telling them to come and sort his bike out. I sneaked out and removed the "oil leak" before the garage mechanics turned up.

 

[XmisterIS]

The motorcycle in question was a BSA Bantam D7. A snorting, evil beast of some 175cc capacity and around 17 brake horse power. Wow, he could reach 60 mph from a standing start in as little as ... well he actually struggled to reach 60 mph!

Reminds me of when I was a learner biker on a 125 - going down the A27 east of Portsmouth with my chest flat against the tank, watching the speedo inch towards 60 mph ... it would get to 59, then I would hit a slight incline ...