Ok then.
So I got up late and all my gear was at work, so rather than smelling all day I bomb it in to work and shower. Using my towel as I thought, turns out it is someone else's, who happened to have purchased a similarly designed towel.
As far as straighteners go, yeh I use them, so do many young guys these days. Not as bad a crime to the fashion police as a 1980's ginger ponytail, imagine the embarrassing despair 'when your dad shows up at the school gates looking like Mick Hucknall in lycra'.
Served.