Give me some dialogue from your day

[Lullabelle]

Yesterday

My colleague has an eight year old son, his school project is to write about another country, food culture etc...

My colleague: Conan wants to do Spain so that he can talk about football, I explained that it isn't about football and he should choose somewhere else. I suggested Singapore, he is starting to get interested

Me: Singapore isn't a country
My colleague: 'after much silence', seriously?
Me: yes, it is a city.
My colleague: S**t. She then addressed the guys in the office
My colleague: Is Singapore a country?
Guys: no, it is a city, why?
My colleague: Conan has already done quite a bit of his project and is getting really into it. It took me ages to get him interested, can't change it now s**t s**t s**t.

 

[Rezillo]

Yesterday
Me: Singapore isn't a country
My colleague: 'after much silence', seriously?
Me: yes, it is a city.

The project is safe - it's a sovereign city state, so technically a country.

 

[young Ed]

Yesterday

My colleague has an eight year old son, his school project is to write about another country, food culture etc...

My colleague: Conan wants to do Spain so that he can talk about football, I explained that it isn't about football and he should choose somewhere else. I suggested Singapore, he is starting to get interested

Me: Singapore isn't a country
My colleague: 'after much silence', seriously?
Me: yes, it is a city.
My colleague: S**t. She then addressed the guys in the office
My colleague: Is Singapore a country?
Guys: no, it is a city, why?
My colleague: Conan has already done quite a bit of his project and is getting really into it. It took me ages to get him interested, can't change it now s**t s**t s**t.

just change the title and every time the project said 'singapore' with the word china
Cheers Ed

 

[Lanzecki]

Don't

The project is safe - it's a sovereign city state, so technically a country.

Don't Ya love technicalitys.

 

[jhawk]

I crack some wise-arse joke...

Dad: "Oh, you're so funny!"
Me: "Well, I do try!"
Dad: "Yes, you are very trying." -.-

 

[SatNavSaysStraightOn]

I'm 2nd in to the bathroom this morning, but hubby hasn't checked the mouse traps in the bathroom... I did and found one had killed a mouse overnight.

Me: Can you take the dead mouse outside please?
Hubby comes into the bathroom and collects dead mouse in trap. A moment later I hear a clatter followed by: IT JUMPED!
Me: The dead mouse in the trap jumped?
Hubby (now in that tiny child like voice he does oh so well): Yes
Me (knowing full well what the answer is): With or without the trap?
Hubby (still in tiny child voice mode): with the trap...
Me (thinking - its going to be one of those days again)


He has a history of losing dead mice attached to traps... 15 years ago when we moved into one of the more dilapidated houses we have lived in he left a dead mouse and trap outside the front door to dispose of once it had stopped raining. We never saw the mouse or the trap again, despite living in that house for 12 years!

 

[Octet]

He has a history of losing dead mice attached to traps... 15 years ago when we moved into one of the more dilapidated houses we have lived in he left a dead mouse and trap outside the front door to dispose of once it had stopped raining. We never saw the mouse or the trap again, despite living in that house for 12 years!

If it had been left outside it could have been a cat which took the one 15 years ago?

 

[swee'pea99]

Not dialogue as such, but...

'er indores and the two munchkins arrive back after a shopping expedition. 'er indores and munchkin major yadda yadda yadda. Munchkin minor silent, other than, catching my eye: 'Never again.' Then away.

 

[SatNavSaysStraightOn]

If it had been left outside it could have been a cat which took the one 15 years ago?

we lived that rurally that there were no cats where we were, mind you we had no neighbours either! Single house down a 1 mile dirt track with a +1000 hectare nature reserve most of it MoD land and the other side was farmland (we were tenants before you ask ) ... We never saw a single cat in the entire 12 years we lived there (in fact we only ever once had Jehovah witnesses as well, and despite promising to come back and talk to us, they never did). We suspect it was more likely a bird of prey despite it being on the doorstep. It was not uncommon to get them less than a few metres from the front door having caught a rabbit or pigeon and we have a very good supply of birds of prey as well as a seriously good supply of rabbits and mice!

 

[ColinJ]

Me, in a total flap, sprinting down a footpath: S**t, s**t, s**t!

Ex, cracking up: Why are you running past me, peeing?

Me, as I overtake her: MASTERMIND!!!!!

Ex, puzzled: What do you mean, 'Mastermind'?

She looks back up the footpath and sees the mother and young girl who (quite literally!) had just 'caught me out' ...

Ex: Never mind, I get it - 'You've started, so you'll finish'!

 

[GrasB]

Me: so you're going to do the opposite of what I say?
Him: Yeah
Me: don't jump off that bridge (Elizabeth Way Bridge)
Him: Oka.... OH F**k off!
Me: So you're not this time?

 

[Octet]

Me: Thank God you're still open! *Panting, Leaning Against the Wall*
LBS: Yep, till 5:30 (it was 5:15 when I ran around the corner)
Me: I need a new tyre, 700x23C and three packs of inner tubes please. The bead on my tyre has split and I've just walked/jogged 4 miles to get here!
LBS: Oh no, where did that happen!
Me: Up by the cinema, I tried to duct tape it just to try and get down here however it failed
LBS: Ah no! I've known some people get by doing that, if it had been the inner tube you could of tied a knot in it
Me: Well I do normally carry spares, but not of tyres and I've already gone through two inner tubes just to get up to where I did

.... A few moments later ...

LBS: Here, use the track pump! You'll be there all night otherwise
Me: Thanks, it's almost on now
LBS: You fine getting home now?
Me: Yes thanks, you're a life saver

 

[glenn forger]

Me: "Maybe you could start the potatoes off in the greenhouse then plant them out.."

My brother, interrupting irritably: "I've no room in the greenhouse!"

Me: "Yes, if you could let me finish my sentence?"

My brother: "Go on"

Me: "Maybe you could start the potatoes off in the greenhouse then plant them out, bumface"

 

[colly]

He has a history of losing dead mice attached to traps... 15 years ago when we moved into one of the more dilapidated houses we have lived in he left a dead mouse and trap outside the front door to dispose of once it had stopped raining. We never saw the mouse or the trap again, despite living in that house for 12 years!

I lost (for a while) a rat trap.
A couple of years back we were plagued with rats. Not liking the idea of poison I set some traps. The following morning 2 were undisturbed. The third was nowhere to be seen. I knew where I'd put it so had a search around. After about 5 mins. I found it, complete with dead rat jammed into one of the holes in the rockery where the rats had made their nest.
I thought at first the rat had not been killed outright and had tried to drag itself to safety, but the rat would have been dead for sure, no question about it. So either the rest of the rats were thinking 'lets save Uncle Fred' or 'hmm, a free lunch'.

Edit. I don't have any traps now, still have rats now and again though.

 

[GrasB]

internal dialogue
Me reading: "Battery removal instructions
1. Before proceeding any further remove the battery as documented on page 97"
Me thinking: "This is page 97 & I'm reading how to remove the the battery!"