Dear all, the holidays are closing in, and I am feeling a bit alone. Over recent months I have been 'seeing someone', although I know from previous endeavours that it will come to nothing, and that we won't be together at all. It's not a convenience per se, but a non-admittance that at the moment we will not be together. It makes me sad, just thinking about it really. Overall, my luck with the ladies hasnever been successful: as has been explained elsewhere, I am autistic and that makes building relationships extremely hard. The last girl I had a serious relationship was nearly 6 years ago now: the girl in question is now married with a child, and I still think about her. She was my first proper 'love', and probably my only love (i was 19 at the time, i am nearly 25 now), and whilst i don't miss her at all, I do miss what I had with her. She made me feel confident, and I felt comfortable around her. Anyway, since then, I have struggled, I have had a ridiculous relationship and too many seeing people events to count anymore. I just feel lonely, and I wish that I could meet a girl who likes me for me, and won't get freaked out by my demeanour. I see myself as a great catch: I am very clever, cultured, sensitive, and if this doesn't sound too vain, pretty good looking, so I can't understand why I am still on the shelf. Any words of encouragement, or dates, are much appreciated.