Another moment of madness chez Vernon

[vernon]

Dare I ask why you keep a chef's blowtorch on your desk?

I keep it next to my sky lanterns

 

[vernon]

Ok so what is the story about all the scaffolding outside your neighbours house.

You not been doing diy have you.Or did the fire spread.

There was some re-rendering and painting but the reason for the extended stay of the metalwork is a mystery as are the occupants. I was thinking of lashing some planks to it to bridge the drives and give me access to our gable end for repainting but as I get dizzy standing on a thick carpet I thought better of it.

 

[vernon]

[quote name='swee'pea99']Excellent story, and an inspiration to dads everywhere. Thinks: must buy a blowtorch...[/QUOTE]

Oh do. They have a multitude of uses limited only by one's imagination

I could have done with it at an inset meeting today when I could have ignited some unsuspecting delegate's papers as a diversionary tactic to make good my escape from a soporifically dull presentation about a potentially exciting educational project.

Soporifically dull is an understatement of the misery inflicted upon me by a double act of two touchy feely practioners of niceness....eeeeughhh

 

[vernon]

The blowtorch must be for burning Cds

Done that.

Microwaving them is more spectacular though

 

[vernon]

Brilliant story. I can't get it into my head that you actually torched the ping pong ball, crazy loon of a dad.

I can be a vengeful dad

 

[Archie_tect]

[Note to self ...ping pong balls make good firelighters for BBQs.]

 

[vernon]

There has been a happy ending. I managed to say sorry with a straight face yesterday morning and the apology was accepted. The scorch marks are minimal and I think that I am forgiven in the way that only women can forgive i.e. the incident is dead and forgotten until revived post-sentencing in a future domestic prosecution......

 

[vernon]

[Note to self ...ping pong balls make good firelighters for BBQs.]

They don't burn long enough.

However, if filled with petrol/paraffin/turps/napalm...now there's an idea worth investigating...any takers?

 

[Archie_tect]

They don't burn long enough.

It just seems like they do...

 

[vernon]

It just seems like they do...

You've been there too?

 

[Globalti]

I always wanted to know what would happen if you stuck the nozzle of a vacuum cleaner in a can of petrol then went away and switched it on at the mains.....

 

[Archie_tect]

I always wanted to know what would happen if you stuck the nozzle of a vacuum cleaner in a can of petrol then went away and switched it on at the mains.....

.... can you run that fast though?

 

[Archie_tect]

...yes Doctor, I was just seeing what happened if you...