Anyone Fancy a Career Change?

[Crankarm]

It was for a job advert on the DWP site for "target elimination specialist" or assassin working for MI6.

MI6 have recently placed ads for James Bond types in the national newspapers. Due to cut backs applicants must have own car or access to a car and be tee-total.

 

[Mad Doug Biker]

I could tell you, but then I would have to kill you.

So TVC, what's your first assign..... Oh right.

 

[PK99]

It was for a job advert on the DWP site for "target elimination specialist" or assassin working for MI6.

MI6 have recently placed ads for James Bond types in the national newspapers. Due to cut backs applicants must have own car or access to a car and be tee-total.

About 25 years ago i inadvertently applied to be a spy.

Saw an enigmatic ad the the paper one weekend "So, a few years out of university. What now? send CV for interesting opportunities" Or something like that, with an agency address.

Sent off CV and a few weeks later received a "Positive Vetting form" {i had worked at Aldermaston & Sellafiled so had filled one out before and knew what it was] and a letter saying the job was "... with and independent group within the ministry of defence ..." ".... the job would involve a mixture of international travel and desk research..." If interested i should fill in the form and they would contact me. I binned it!


Aside: The spell checker did not like Aldermaston and offered Spermatozoon instead

 

[Mad Doug Biker]

I'd LOVE to be a spy, but I'm crap at lying

Why did you bin it by the way? Are you crap at lying too??

 

[Crankarm]

About 25 years ago i inadvertently applied to be a spy.

Saw an enigmatic ad the the paper one weekend "So, a few years out of university. What now? send CV for interesting opportunities" Or something like that, with an agency address.

Sent off CV and a few weeks later received a "Positive Vetting form" {i had worked at Aldermaston & Sellafiled so had filled one out before and knew what it was] and a letter saying the job was "... with and independent group within the ministry of defence ..." ".... the job would involve a mixture of international travel and desk research..." If interested i should fill in the form and they would contact me. I binned it!


Aside: The spell checker did not like Aldermaston and offered Spermatozoon instead

While working at the Home Office a few years ago a colleague applied for a vacancy advertised in the Royal Society of Chemistry mag which he thought was for a research chemist but which turned out to be a n operational position for MI6. I know a different dpartment I hear you say but when they wanted to vet his family, girlfirend, gold fish, and they talked about discreet engagements over seas for long periods, being outside normal society but still under the wing of the UK secret security services, he knocked his application on the head. He went for a first interview some where in London and would only say that it was very bizarre, very tinker tailor soldier spy. He was a very able colleague, very bright, reliable and rapier sense of humour. He was mad about pidgeons as he had several prize winning birds which he had bred which they apparently told him they "knew" all about. Gulp.

 

[Crankarm]

I'd LOVE to be a spy, but I'm crap at lying

Why did you bin it by the way? Are you crap at lying too??

See my post above. Lying has nothing to do with the role. You have to have an extremely sharp mind, think on your feet, be able to process huge amounts of information quickly, be dogged, be totally unassuming which my colleague was down to a T and be prepared to devote your life to the Service. It is NOT for the faint hearted or people who think they get to star in Spooks. You enter a totally different world from which there is NO return. Although you are free, "freedoms" you take for granted as a civilian cease to exist.

 

[Mad Doug Biker]

See my post above. Lying has nothing to do with the role.

Having to act, etc so that nobody ever expects (unassuming as you said below) I mean.

You have to have an extremely sharp mind, [think on your feet, be able to process huge amounts of information quickly, be dogged, be totally unassuming which my colleague was down to a T and be prepared to devote your life to the Service. It is NOT for the faint hearted or people who think they get to star in Spooks. You enter a totally different world from which there is NO return. Although you are free, "freedoms" you take for granted as a civilian cease to exist.

For the record, I was kidding (should have added a smiley...Edit: Just did), I appreciate it isn't as glamourous as in the films, and well, I imagine it could be seriously dangerous for your health too!

Can I ask, do you 'cease to exist' too?

 

[Mad Doug Biker]

I doubt they would even consider me anyway!