Arguments with close relatives?

[Dadam]

We were on our regular family Facetime catch up call with my elderly Mum last night and I got the full house for anti cyclist bingo!

A regular topic is just getting places she needs to. She is registered disabled with a blue badge, can't walk very far, and does struggle to get some places if it's difficult or inconvenient to park. The subject of getting into the city centre came up, and the current roadworks changes to the traffic system, and it's all very well if you can ride a bike or catch the bus. Then without further warning I get both barrels of "bloody cyclists!".... "Hang on, I'm a 'bloody cyclist'!"

So off we go. Road tax ✔️they don't obey traffic laws ✔️getting in the way ✔️ riding side by side ✔️ killing pedestrians (!) ✔️should have insurance ✔️

I really don't understand how her once seeing one person on a bike go the wrong way round a roundabout translates to they all go the wrong way round the roundabout! The thought process seems bizarre to me. I really did my best to remain calm because, well, Mum... but I was getting the full daily heil repertoire, not that she reads that, and facts and reasonableness just don't seem to penetrate. I'm actually getting wound up again just recalling it. We usually steer clear of politics in our chats (mainly due to B-----), but this came in out of left field.

 

[Deleted member 35268]

I've not had it from family, but from friends or acquitances yes.
I was asked why it was OK for a cyclist to overtake a line of stationery traffic ahead of some single lane roadworks only to end up slowing the traffic up when the light wen't green. The following discussion was overheard by the entire restaurant.

 

[steveindenmark]

She is old and she has earned the right to be a grumpy sod.

I say this because I am 64 and will not be denied at this point in time. 😁

 

[richardfm]

She is old and she has earned the right to be a grumpy sod.

I say this because I am 64 and will not be denied at this point in time. 😁

There is a difference between being grumpy and having irrational anti cyclist views.

 

[oldwheels]

We were on our regular family Facetime catch up call with my elderly Mum last night and I got the full house for anti cyclist bingo!

A regular topic is just getting places she needs to. She is registered disabled with a blue badge, can't walk very far, and does struggle to get some places if it's difficult or inconvenient to park. The subject of getting into the city centre came up, and the current roadworks changes to the traffic system, and it's all very well if you can ride a bike or catch the bus. Then without further warning I get both barrels of "bloody cyclists!".... "Hang on, I'm a 'bloody cyclist'!"

So off we go. Road tax ✔️they don't obey traffic laws ✔️getting in the way ✔️ riding side by side ✔️ killing pedestrians (!) ✔️should have insurance ✔️

I really don't understand how her once seeing one person on a bike go the wrong way round a roundabout translates to they all go the wrong way round the roundabout! The thought process seems bizarre to me. I really did my best to remain calm because, well, Mum... but I was getting the full daily heil repertoire, not that she reads that, and facts and reasonableness just don't seem to penetrate. I'm actually getting wound up again just recalling it. We usually steer clear of politics in our chats (mainly due to B-----), but this came in out of left field.

 

[oldwheels]

Sorry pressed wrong button and cannot get back as software has a tirrivee.

 

[SpokeyDokey]

There is a difference between being grumpy and having irrational anti cyclist views.

I believe that was tic.

 

[Scotchlovingcylist]

My dad's the same, often posts on Facebooks local traffic rant pages about it too. I just shrug it off and let him get on with it and don't get into it with him as I know it will wind me up.

 

[presta]

I've not had it from family, but from friends or acquitances yes.
I was asked why it was OK for a cyclist to overtake a line of stationery traffic ahead of some single lane roadworks only to end up slowing the traffic up when the light wen't green. The following discussion was overheard by the entire restaurant.

If I'm filtering up the side of a queue at the lights I always stop once I'm close enough to get through on the next change, there's no point in going any further, because you're just putting yourself in front of cars that are going to pass again within seconds of the lights changing. No different to the MGIF driver who pushes past just to end up stopping at a junction 50 yards up the road.

Some time ago a woman on twitter posted a video of herself at some lights: there was just one van at the stop line, and she overtook it, then swerved into the ASL box in front of the van just at the instant the lights changed. Her complaint was that he honked at her.

I'm not surprised, I'd have been tempted, too. When I pointed out that she'd gained nothing from doing so, and only succeeded in pissing off one more motorist when we already get enough aggro from them as it is, her only justification for it was "because I'm allowed to".

 

[HMS_Dave]

There is no point in arguing... Just go along with it. Just say how you are forever swerving because we're trying to avoid the bodies of pedestrians killed by other cyclists and claim cycling helmets are change collection devices for begging off of the rich more important motorists in the hope of one day affording a superior motor vehicle and also state that hi viz is a form of ASBO and that allows others to see where the criminals on 2 wheels are, so that motorists can aim for them.

 

[mustang1]

I think the angry genes were removed from my body at birth! Stuff like this does not bother me at all. Family, friends, strangers, whoever. They can say whatever they want, with or without reason, they're own form of logic, strawmans or whatever. If they don't get it, then they don't get it.

 

[Ming the Merciless]

Road tax ✔️they don't obey traffic laws ✔️getting in the way ✔️ riding side by side ✔️ killing pedestrians (!) ✔️should have insurance ✔️

She’s describing people in cars, and has got cyclist mixed up with motorist by mistake. Old people sometimes use the wrong words when they can’t think of the correct one. Too embarrassed to admit the word escapes them.

 

[Debade]

I see opportunity but not at the time of the call, perhaps follow-up emeils, at least to get started.

But you also need to know the best language and approach to rebutt these comments. And all the benefits of active transportation.

If you become a student af advocacy, you might convince them. Especially those who might have been lured by group think while on the phone,

One of the things about advocacy is it often needs to be 1:1 for calmness and clarity. Having said that, people are irrational when they want to be. Convincing one relative would be a victory.

 

[Ming the Merciless]

 

[cyberknight]

I had a childhood friend who emigrated to aus and knows i like cycling as we used to communicate via facefluff but every time something related to cycling came up it turned into a bashing so i stopped all communication on it .My mother always bashes my entire family and doesnt like me cycling but shes 80 and had a stroke a few years back so she gets a bit of slack ,