Bad effects of confrontation?

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jeltz

Veteran
Don't sweat it just be yourself as you have been.

1st guy, well he's a prat and maybe if a few more people mutter at him then perhaps he'll question why.

2nd guy, well he knows he shouldn't have been on the phone and his reaction suggests that he's uncomfortable with his sexuality.
 

cyberknight

As long as I breathe, I attack.
After having a confrontation that could have dissolved into fisticuffs i have ordered a muvi clone from ebay and at least if some one tries anything or does wipe me up i will have a bit of evidence,as the cops said without other witnesses all they can do is have a chat with him.
Then if it was a real nutter they may come back for seconds,luckily for me with bank hols/shutdown and new bike will be a month since i have been on that road as i changed routes to avoid him.

Upshot is you get idiots after aggravation and they will try to cause it no matter what you do.
 

Glow worm

Legendary Member
Location
Near Newmarket
StuartG said:
I too have lately come to the same conclusion. Reward good behaviour (a wave & smile), ignore bad. Except it is easier to write that then do it. I failed, again, only this morning.

Not only is righteous indignation likely to even more infuriate the sinner - but I believe it is just as likely to lead to loss of concentration in oneself. Actually I try to review the incident. Just because the other person was in the wrong doesn't mean the incident could not have been mitigated by a bit more anticipation and defensive riding on my part. You can't control others but you can (well sometimes) control yourself.

So give yourself a smile and a wave when you DON'T retaliate ...

Couldn't agree more with that- top post. For some reason, I sometimes find that when I deliberately set off saying to myself 'no sod in a cage is going to get to me today', it's often when I get the most confrontation!

Theres' also something that I'm not completetly comfortable with and that's giving drivers a wave or a smile for considerate driving. It's almost like saying 'thanks for not making my wife a widow to save yourself a couple of seconds and for driving like you're supposed to. But I do it all the same and agree it's important to send motons the right message i.e. that we're not all RLJ pavelment cycling hooligans!
 

BentMikey

Rider of Seolferwulf
Location
South London
Got cut up by a rasta man who told me I should be on teh cycle path on vauxhall bridge. I told him "do you see this camera" he was like "Yeah, I noticed that", so answered him "Well watch it then." No more trouble, LOL!
 

jonny jeez

Legendary Member
Recumbentpanda, nice post and also (in my opinion) nice attitude....I think it is really important that we understand, as cyclists, that even our existence can rub people up the wrong way and we either need to learn how to diffuse that (or alter their perception in a positive fashion) or learn how to throw a really mean punch.

It sounds to me that in one day’s ride you have managed to learn what took me a whole summer to take on board

I know I have said it before, but I don’t believe anyone should "start" something that they are not 100% confident they can finish...unfortunately, one person on a bike (even a bent one) is often no match for one person in a powerful and protected car.

Its sometimes best to let it all slide, don’t get wound up or do anything to wind others up (even if they are wrong) and learn from it.(I can hear Magger's screaming from here!!)

also, as I find myself saying in almost every post these days...buy a head cam...if another persons try’s to start a problem and you are not sure you can end it, then a single finger pointing at your head cam will often diffuse the row before it escalates.

Stay safe
 

BSRU

A Human Being
Location
Swindon
Personally I do not usually get angry, just smile knowing it's been caught on camera, ready for YouTube, and the Police if particularly bad driving.
 
OP
OP
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recumbentpanda

Veteran
Interesting paper

Thanks JJ,

I am increasingly thinking there needs to be a national campaign directed at motorists -who would finance it I don't know!

An interesting paper, which throws light on many of the situations discussed on this and other cycling forums is at:

www.etcproceedings.org/paper/download/715

The language is a bit dense in places, but the general gist is clear. It seems to say that it's not just about individual motorists being obnoxious, its about a general social mindset. Things like that can only be shifted by fairly major (and well-designed) campaigns -and more cyclists on the road of course . . .

With the levels of aggression out there, I think we are in danger of losing the right to the road in some places (see recent threads elsewhere on here). I am lucky where I live with miles of good quality off-road tracks and quiet lanes. Nevertheless there are some roads round here I would ride in fear of my life, no matter how 'assertive' I was, and many junctions that I would consider just unfeasibly dangerous.
 

snorri

Legendary Member
An interesting paper indeed.
I found the paragraph on page 3 regarding the conflict when a driver wishes to be a "good citizen" explained some of the close (rural) overtakes I have suffered. The driver must choose between the inconvenience to following motor vehicles if an overtake is delayed, or the safety of the cyclist he wishes to overtake. Some drivers clearly have a problem with this.

(It is a pity when topics like this, of interest to all cyclists, get hidden away in Commuting, Campaigning would be a more appropriate section)
 

Origamist

Legendary Member
snorri said:
An interesting paper indeed.
I found the paragraph on page 3 regarding the conflict when a driver wishes to be a "good citizen" explained some of the close (rural) overtakes I have suffered. The driver must choose between the inconvenience to following motor vehicles if an overtake is delayed, or the safety of the cyclist he wishes to overtake. Some drivers clearly have a problem with this.

It's a part of the research undertaken for the TRL paper: "Drivers' perceptions of cyclists" TRL report 549. The full paper is still available at the TRL site.
 

jonny jeez

Legendary Member
recumbentpanda said:
Thanks JJ,

I am increasingly thinking there needs to be a national campaign directed at motorists -who would finance it I don't know!


I noticed (for the first time) the govnt ad on cycle awareness this weekend, set around a bank heist where the raiders were really aware of the police (all of them looking like giants) but totally missed a cyclist...who they struck. I guess the message was, you only see what you are looking for, so start to look for cyclists.

i think this ad is a falure....as it suggest to a driver that it is all their fault/responsibility (I know a lot of the time it is) and also suggests that cyclists dont need to take any respomnsibility this accentuates driver dislike of cyclists and creates an adversarial position.

The old "think Bike" ads were the same and had me screaming at the telly that bikes should think about bloody cars!! (I say this as a biker and a car driver).

its better to "humanise" everyone.

The new biker awareness ads are far better with large neon signs over the heads of motorcyclist letting us know that they aren't bikers, but are "daves" from sidcup, or "Steve's and Julies" from just up your road....I think these are far more effective at generating empathy and reminding us that we are all imperfect humans and we all need to help to make things better.
 

MacB

Lover of things that come in 3's
recumbentpanda said:
I am increasingly thinking there needs to be a national campaign directed at motorists -who would finance it I don't know!

Wholeheartedly agree and I think it should begin with basic highway code stuff, the myth of 'road tax' and who pays for the roads. Anyone who's had an altercation with a driver, read an internet message board or had a conversation with a non-cyclist, knows how little is known about the rights and wrongs of things. Maybe a series of national adverts:-

Cyclists - where they are allowed to cycle
Cyclists - what laws apply to them
Cyclists - why they position themselves in certain ways
General - what constitutes a vehicle and what is a vehicle excise licence
General - where the money comes from to pay for the roads and how much is for motorways only
General - fuel duty - we all pay it, motorists on petrol and cyclists on the food they consume to enable cycling

I can't see how this wouldn't reduce the amount, or at least the nature, of conflict. It would be bliss not to have to have the arguments about where I can cycle and tax.

As for how it would be funded - I can see arguments for CTC money, lottery money, donations and use of the existing H&S budgets.
 

BentMikey

Rider of Seolferwulf
Location
South London
BentMikey said:
Got cut up by a rasta man who told me I should be on teh cycle path on vauxhall bridge. I told him "do you see this camera" he was like "Yeah, I noticed that", so answered him "Well watch it then." No more trouble, LOL!


R919HGA on youtube innit.
 
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