Belated Friday Joke

Elmer Fudd

Miserable Old Bar Steward
A man in a hot air balloon realised he was lost. He reduced altitude
and spotted a woman below. He descended a bit more and shouted,
"Excuse me, can you help me? I promised a friend I would meet him an
hour ago but I don't know where I am."

The woman below replied, "You're in a hot air balloon hovering
approximately 30 feet above the ground. You're between 40 and 41
degrees north latitude and between 59 and 60 degrees west longitude."

"You must be in Information Technology," said the balloonist.

"I am," replied the woman, "how did you know?"

"Well," answered the balloonist, "everything you told me is probably
technically correct, but I've no idea what to make of your information
and the fact is, I'm still lost. Frankly, you've not been much help at
all. If anything, you've delayed my trip."

The woman below responded, "You must be in Management."

"I am," replied the balloonist, "but how did you know?"

"Well," said the woman, "you don't know where you are or where you're
going. You have risen to where you are, due to a large quantity of hot
air. You made a promise, which you've no idea how to keep, and you
expect people beneath you to solve your problems. The fact is you are
in exactly the same position you were in before we met, but now,
somehow, it's all my fecking fault."


Legendary Member
Guy walks into a chipshop.....takes a look at the menu...


He asks the girl behind the counter...'are you the girl who gives the w@nks'

'Yes' she replies...

'Be a good girl...go wash your hands.............i want a pie' :rolleyes:
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