Bowel cancer test

[andabby]

Thankfully I do mine this time of year, not sure how leaving it on the window sill for 3 days would work, with the sun beating in.

 

[Vapin' Joe]

Have they stretched it to three years? I was due my third one in November but have heard nothing yet.

 

[vickster]

@fossyant You might mean prostate...prostrate could be rather different...

 

[fossyant]

@fossyant
You might mean prostate...prostrate could be rather different...

Whoops slip of the R !

 

[fossyant]

I'm too young for the bowel one, but have been subject to the old digital exam. A rather unpleasant feeling that you are about to empty your bowels all over the specialist !

 

[jefmcg]

Whoops slip of the R !

By coincidence, "slip of the R" is the test for prostate cancer.

 

[Crackle]

Get on with it Rich. We all know you're full of shoot.

 

[jefmcg]

This is such an old man's thread. I'm soooo glad I'm young.

old person's thread, please.

It's interesting, more people die of bowel cancer than breast cancer, but breast cancer gets more funding, publicity and charitable donations. I like the explanation "it's hard to get people to wear brown ribbons"

 

[Pro Tour Punditry]

A couple of years ago I went to the docs as I was concerned that I had blood in my poo, he did the usual check of inserting his finger up my arse and then sent me for tests, which included collecting a sample and more probing. All tests came back negative. The blood disappeared, but then a few weeks later the same thing happened. It then dawned on me that I had been eating a lot of beetroot on both occasions.

Oh how I laughed...

 

[Mr Celine]

I often hate my work but the biannual bowel screening test makes me realise that someone else has a worse job than I do.

 

[PK99]

I've recently done my second lot of tests and had a thumbs up both times.

Yes, it can be quite messy.

 

[slowmotion]

My screening kit arrived , out of the blue, within a couple of days of my sixtieth birthday. I was quite touched. Smearing a bit of poo onto a target with a cardboard stick is pretty easy. Catching the jobbie so you can get some onto the spatula in the first case is the bit that's daunting, but you learn quickly.

MTFU @rich p.........seal that foil pouch!

 

[raleighnut]

Whoops slip of the R !

I think you mean 'Slip up the Aaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrr' !

 

[rich p]

And so the day dawns on the final challenge for the contestant. One last push and our intrepid adventurer will have completed his tasks.
Didn't Lenny Henry get his first big break on New Faeces?

 

[Globalti]

Presumably the reason why they ask you to do three tests is just so as to eliminate food-based false alarms?

By the same token, if all three tests were positive, presumably they would ask you to repeat them?

It's not difficult to do and anybody who has brought up children will be less squeamish about poo.

By the way, where's @Fnaar with his joke about the Dr putting both hands on his shoulders?