Christmas dress etiquette crisis! Help me please, style gurus.

[slowmotion]

We have kindly been invited to stay with some close relatives for a day over Christmas. We love them dearly but they live in a big 'ouse in Gloucestershire that wasn't exactly built by Wimpey, and they have higher standards than we do. I was wondering what to wear for Christmas lunch, a source of worry because my entire wardrobe seems to comprise of about 15 pairs of Levi 501 Red Tab jeans in various increasing stages of disrepair. The rest of my wardrobe is a morning suit bought from a hire shop thirty years ago, and a suit given to me by the widow of a friend who died ten years ago. Several £7 sweaters from George at Asda fill in the rest of the gaps.

Anyway....I bought some new 501 Red tabs in order to cut the mustard in smart company over Christmas. The word came down that jeans were not allowed on the white sofas because they might stain them. The wind has been taken out of my sails. I really don't think that I'm quite ready for generously cut mustard cords. Besides my incontinence might stain the upholstery far more badly that mere Levis.
Would this do?

 

[jefmcg]

Wear a kilt.

 

[slowmotion]

Stain-wise, they do have a certain reputation.

 

[Smurfy]

.........my incontinence might stain the upholstery far more badly that mere Levis......

Wear a kilt.

 

[slowmotion]

I already know about that unfortunate episode. It might be described as "stale buns".

 

[Aperitif]

Take a dustsheet

 

[screenman]

Seeing as you are a cyclist then surely anything lycra will do.

 

[the_mikey]

As a resident of South Gloucestershire I can reliably inform you that the expected uniform is in fact Green wellies and tweed.

 

[deptfordmarmoset]

If they're worried about jean stains they'd have kept the plastic covers on their chairs, wouldn't they?

 

[fossyant]

Cheap smart trousers from Matalan

 

[fossyant]

Or you could join me

Grundys and a ward gown lying in bed whilst the standard lot get to sit in a chair round a table. I'll be slurping my turkey down.

 

[bancrobba]

May be a bit of a departure from 501s but is festive and wipe clean.

 

[winjim]

Pick from:

1. Wear whatever you like. People aren't usually as snobby as you'd think, and if they are, who cares?
2. It's Christmas, and a chance to dress up in your finest gear. Don't slob about in jeans, get something smart on, it's a special occasion.
3. Chinos.

 

[cyberknight]

Ask the hosts what they deem appropriate?, im sure they would rather be asked than have the sideward glances ?
Personally if i invite someone im happy they have turned up rather than what they are wearing but some folk are funny.

 

[mybike]

Why would anyone wear jeans?