Corrupt A Wish

[welsh dragon]

You have finished all your work in record time. But your bosses didn't appreciate your hard work.

I wish you could spend the rest of the day doing whatever you want

 

[Matthew_T]

You can spend the rest of the day doing whatever you want........................................with your wife.

I wish I could sing.

 

[ayceejay]

You can sing but only in Welsh and LOUD.
I wish I was twice the man I used to be a quarter of a century ago.

 

[colly]

You are twice the man you used to be 25 years ago. You are also waiting for a sex change operation.

I wish I had telepathic powers.

 

[Jefferson Meriwether]

You have telepathic powers. Your powers only work on rats.

I wish I had the courage to quite my job, jump on my bike and cycle round the country being a migrant worker.

 

[Deleted member 23692]

Edit: beaten to it

 

[Davidc]

You are a migrant worker with a bike, but you're being paid too little to buy patches to repair the puncture you got today.

I wish I could spend the whole of the winter away on holiday.

 

[Nigel-YZ1]

You can spend the winter away, but only Siberia has hotel rooms left.

I wish I was more decisive.

 

[Markymark]

You are more decisive but every decision is the wrong one.

I wish I had had no more visits from the 'p fairy'.

 

[colly]

You never puncture because you never find the time to ride your bike.

I wish my dog didn't fart

 

[Nigel-YZ1]

Your dog doesn't fart, but suddenly explodes due to the gas buildup

I wish I was a punk rocker, I wish I still had hair...

 

[ComedyPilot]

You are a punk rocker, but the only hair you have is on your back.....

I wish to learn to dive with somersaults

 

[Moon bunny]

You can somersault, but only onto concrete.
I wish my cat would come in out of the garden and sit on my knee.

 

[Markymark]

Your cat will sit on your knee and leave you with a nice warm present on your trousers.

I wish I'd invented the word Chillax.

 

[colly]

You did invent the word 'chillax' but you are so uptight about hearing it all over the place you are investing heavily in earplugs.

I wish I could walk up walls like a gecko.