Criteria for avoiding films

[MontyVeda]

Okay - what about Bridge of Spies?

does it have Robin Williams in it?... if so, i probably won't bother

 

[Tenacious Sloth]

does it have Robin Williams in it?... if so, i probably won't bother

You may be relieved to know that Mr Williams passed away in 2014, a year before Bridge of Spies.

 

[midlife]

Christmas films ..,........ Apart from Elf

Shaun

 

[MontyVeda]

You may be relieved to know that Mr Williams passed away in 2014, a year before Bridge of Spies.

Good.

Does that mean it's got Hanks or Cruise in it? If so, i still won't bother.

 

[jefmcg]

Personally life is too short for dubbed movies or bad English language remakes.

Can I add to the list of "number" films (yes I know the OP has edited it) The Taking of Pelham 123, Banlieue 13 (Luc Beeson's French language films are generally better than his English ones)

 

[MontyVeda]

who's Luc Beeson?

 

[potsy]

I avoid anything without zombies/vampires/werewolves.

I also avoid anything starring Steven Seagull/John Wayne or Will Ferrell.

 

[jefmcg]

god damn superhero movies! They keep remaking the same ones, but that's ok, because they are all basically the same anyway, they run for hours and they are sucking up all the studios' money, and the best screens at the cinema.


View: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vbYhRL_6b-Y

 

[nickyboy]

Good.

Does that mean it's got Hanks or Cruise in it? If so, i still won't bother.

Do you actually like any films?

I bet you're a Dukes Playhouse* arty type

* Lancaster in ref

 

[sackville d]

A poster for said film featuring people running away from explosions whilst pointing an automatic pistol which is held in the horizontal position.

 

[MontyVeda]

Do you actually like any films?

I bet you're a Dukes Playhouse* arty type

* Lancaster in ref

I do like films... but not really the hollywood blockbuster oscar bait type films. You know, the sort of films where the producers think "Hanks would be a great lead for this film!"... stick a big name on an average film and there's plenty of bums on seats in its opening weekend. They don't give a sh!t about good films, they just want to make a good return on their investment... so yes, I'm more likely to go to the Duke's to see a film I'm likely to enjoy than go to Vue to watch a 'blockbuster'.

 

[John the Monkey]

Just to point out that the remake rule would exclude Carpenter's "The Thing". Combine it with the rapper rule, and you exclude the daft, but surprisingly good fun "22 Jump Street".

Anyroad, going back to posters, any film in which the character is depicted leaning (especially if the leads are leaning upon each other, back to back, and grinning wryly) and said poster appears on 5 or more of the buses I see during the day.

 

[Tin Pot]

Didn't want to pollute the "What film did you watch last night?" thread with this, but needed to share...

There are several rules a film has to pass before I'll invest time watching it.


1. Won't watch any film with a digit at the end of the title as it displays a distinct lack of imagination (i.e. Police Academy 34).
Edit: The digit must indicate Another in the same series as a previous film.

2. Won't watch any film with "vs" in the title as it shows excessive greed in wanting to cash in on existing franchises (i.e. Batman vs Superman)

3. Won't watch any film staring Jean Claude Van Damme or Steven Seagal.

4. Won't watch any film that has the words "One woman's journey" anywhere in the description.

5. Won't watch any films with Zombies, werewolves or vampires in them as I'm unable to suspend my disbelief.

Edit: 6. Any Star Wars film. I just don't get what all the fuss is about. Have never managed to watch one all the way through.

There are of course exceptions to the rules (in very rare cases). Terminator 2 for instance, which to me is far better than the original.

So. What other films have I missed out on that don't satisfy my criteria, and what additional rules would you add?

Graham

1. Popular with other people

 

[John the Monkey]

god damn superhero movies!

I think that it's got to the point with these where they're too large a genre to dismiss out of hand (the way, in times gone by, people might claim a dislike of westerns).

There are good ones, middling ones, and dire ones.

 

[MontyVeda]

Just to point out that the remake rule would exclude Carpenter's "The Thing". Combine it with the rapper rule, and you exclude the daft, but surprisingly good fun "22 Jump Street".

Anyroad, going back to posters, any film in which the character is depicted leaning (especially if the leads are leaning upon each other, back to back, and grinning wryly) and said poster appears on 5 or more of the buses I see during the day.

The Maltese Falcon we all know and love and regard as a classic was the 3rd remake of that novel. I think The Wizard of Oz is a remake too...

I'm with you on the buses too... a film advertised on the side of a bus is likely to be pants. It's all part of that 'bums on seats in the opening weekend' theory... get the punters in before the critics (probably rightly) slam it.

As for rappers/popstars in films... it's usually a bad idea/marketing gimmick, but i enjoyed Gridlocked starring Tim Roth and Tupac.