Damn, so close!

[CopperBrompton]

I just had an email from Microsoft saying "Your email address has won $1 million".

So not me, but my email address - damn! I'm going to be sitting at my desk, nose to the grindstone, and my bloody email address is going to be lazing on a beach in Bermuda necking down cocktails and sending me postcards.

 

[gaz]

see if you can trick your e-mail to giving your it's account number and sort code.

 

[CopperBrompton]

That's a good idea, I'll send it an email.

 

[darkstar]

This kind bloke offered to give me a few million aswell a while back, all I had to do was provide my bank details... What a kind offer

 

[bauldbairn]

This kind bloke offered to give me a few million aswell a while back, all I had to do was provide my bank details... What a kind offer

Me too! Isn't it surprizing that in these "times of recession" there are so many charitable fellow's out there, looking out for our finance's.

Who'd have thought, that by mearly allowing this nice chap to deposit his large amount of money in my account, he'd be willing to give me a share for my trouble. Who said there's no goodwill in the world today.

 

[Globalti]

I feel sorry for the Nigerian astronaut who's stuck at the ISS:

Subject: Nigerian Astronaut Wants To Come Home
Dr. Bakare Tunde
Astronautics Project Manager
National Space Research and Development Agency (NASRDA)
Plot 555
Misau Street
PMB 437
Garki, Abuja, FCT NIGERIA

Dear Mr. Sir,

REQUEST FOR ASSISTANCE-STRICTLY CONFIDENTIAL

I am Dr. Bakare Tunde, the cousin of Nigerian Astronaut, Air Force Major Abacha Tunde. He was the first African in space when he made a secret flight to the Salyut 6 space station in 1979. He was on a later Soviet spaceflight, Soyuz T-16Z to the secret Soviet military space station Salyut 8T in 1989. He was stranded there in 1990 when the Soviet Union was dissolved. His other Soviet crew members returned to earth on the Soyuz T-16Z, but his place was taken up by return cargo. There have been occasional Progrez supply flights to keep him going since that time. He is in good humor, but wants to come home.

In the 14-years since he has been on the station, he has accumulated flight pay and interest amounting to almost $ 15,000,000 American Dollars. This is held in a trust at the Lagos National Savings and Trust Association. If we can obtain access to this money, we can place a down payment with the Russian Space Authorities for a Soyuz return flight to bring him back to Earth. I am told this will cost $ 3,000,000 American Dollars. In order to access the his trust fund we need your assistance.

Consequently, my colleagues and I are willing to transfer the total amount to your account or subsequent disbursement, since we as civil servants are prohibited by the Code of Conduct Bureau (Civil Service Laws) from opening and/ or operating foreign accounts in our names.

Needless to say, the trust reposed on you at this juncture is enormous. In return, we have agreed to offer you 20 percent of the transferred sum, while 10 percent shall be set aside for incidental expenses (internal and external) between the parties in the course of the transaction. You will be mandated to remit the balance 70 percent to other accounts in due course.

Kindly expedite action as we are behind schedule to enable us include downpayment in this financial quarter.

Please acknowledge the receipt of this message via my direct number 234 (0) 9-234-2220 only.

Yours Sincerely, Dr. Bakare Tunde
Astronautics Project Manager
tip@nasrda.gov.ng

http://www.nasrda.gov.ng/

 

[bauldbairn]

I feel sorry for the Nigerian astronaut who's stuck at the ISS:

Subject: Nigerian Astronaut Wants To Come Home
Dr. Bakare Tunde
Astronautics Project Manager
National Space Research and Development Agency (NASRDA)
Plot 555
Misau Street
PMB 437
Garki, Abuja, FCT NIGERIA

Dear Mr. Sir,

REQUEST FOR ASSISTANCE-STRICTLY CONFIDENTIAL

I am Dr. Bakare Tunde, the cousin of Nigerian Astronaut, Air Force Major Abacha Tunde. He was the first African in space when he made a secret flight to the Salyut 6 space station in 1979. He was on a later Soviet spaceflight, Soyuz T-16Z to the secret Soviet military space station Salyut 8T in 1989. He was stranded there in 1990 when the Soviet Union was dissolved. His other Soviet crew members returned to earth on the Soyuz T-16Z, but his place was taken up by return cargo. There have been occasional Progrez supply flights to keep him going since that time. He is in good humor, but wants to come home.

In the 14-years since he has been on the station, he has accumulated flight pay and interest amounting to almost $ 15,000,000 American Dollars.

By my reckoning this guy has already broken the endurance record for occupying a space station by more than 12.5 years.

Amazingly after all this time - he can still laugh at his unfortunate situation. That Abacha Tunde must be made of stern stuff.

Those damned Soviets won't even take him aboard one of their Progrez supply flights - they must be carrying at least Abacha's weight in food to keep him alive, unbelievable.

 

[Spinney]

You've got to admire their imagination, though!

 

[bauldbairn]

You've got to admire their imagination, though!

+1, very funny - unless some old dear(gent) falls for it and loses their entire retirement fund!