I visited Disneyland Paris just before Christmas with the family (my 4 my parents in law and my brother in-law's family - 9 of us in all)
I thought I would share a review in case anyone is thinking of going...
Ah Disneyland Paris. Theme park of dreams.
Disneyland is to Paris as Luton is to London. Not actually really in Paris. If you arrive during the day you can get the TGV from Charles de Gaulle and it takes just 9 minutes. There is also the Magic Shuttle Coach which takes about 45 minutes to an hour depending on your hotel. if there are 9 of you arriving at 7.45PM your option is a taxi. This has the advantage of going to your hotel directly (45 mins) and also being cheaper for 9 people than the other methods of transport.
We stayed at Sequoia Lodge which was actually really nice. My only quibble is the lack of sockets in the rooms. They have fitted a little wireless charging block that has a USB port on it, but no sign of any power actually near the beds. The staff were pleasant and the hotel well appointed. The hotel food was also very good. Slightly more difficult for the finnicky - we ate at the Hunter's grill buffet. The older men loved the food - Venison two ways, trout, mackerel, pheasant, veal and lamb. The only sign of chicken was in chicken nuggets for the kids. Lots of veggie options too but for vegetarians that don't live mostly on potato, halloumi and cheddar cheese.
Anyway onto the Park itself. - if you have never been to a US Disney park, then I imagine that Disneyland Paris will blow you away. It does have much in common with its US relatives, but there is also a gulf that will never be crossed. You see the problem with Disneyland Paris is best summed up as being a microcosm of the relationship between the Americans and the French.
First - the good. Disneyland Paris (DLP) has been spruced up in recent years with many rides reconditioned and repainted. There are also new rides such the Spiderman Web ride and Ratatouille (when it’s actually working). The Imagineering is as impressive as it always is. The theming in the new Marvel area is superb and a lot of the learning from Florida has been brought across. For example, the Pym kitchen serves food which has been subjected to Pym Particle experimentation so it’s either oversized or undersized. It also has amazing cocktails - clearly inspired by the cocktail bar in Disney Orlando’s Star Wars area.
The processions are wonderful and the latest in fireworks, laser lighting, digital projection and drone tech brings main street and the castle to life every night. Talking of the castle, the sleeping dragon is fun and there is now a glassworks where artisans will make up a glass wand for you.
DLP has all the latest fast pass options, early access for guests staying on property and the option to “buy” a fastpass for single ride for money. There are also single rider lanes.
It has some advantages in that each day isn’t a 12 mile walk in 40 degree heat with almost no shelter. That said if you are not a fan of cold and rain, it’s probably not for you for a lot of the year. Rides, particularly in Hollywood Studios, are pleasingly close together.
Sounds great so far right?
The first major thing you will notice when visiting DLP is that for every ride, every menu, every instruction French is first. This was mandated by the French government. “Zis park is in France, epuis everysink must be in French. Viva la France!!”. Thusly we get Tom Holland dubbed into French with subtitles (our dual language translation machine natch) in the Web ride. Occasionally there are better approaches - for example in Tower of Terror you have a 50% chance of getting the original American narration and 50% chance of getting the French dubbing.
The second thing you will notice is that the French have employment rights. That’s right. You can’t just sack a French employee for not remembering to say “Have a great day” or just ignoring people. You can’t sack them for walking past a piece of litter and not picking it up. Also you have to pay them a decent wage which means that it is more costly to employ more people. Therefore you don’t always get immediate attention from cast members and the Park is noticeably less clean than the US parks. In the restaurants, wait staff will ignore you - they are not relying on tips to live.
You can mitigate this a little - making an effort to speak French automatically dials service up a notch.
The third thing you will notice is that there is clearly a covert war going on as regards the food. The American bosses want to serve food as they would serve it in America. The French want to serve good food. They can’t and therefore make the food as bad as it is humanly possible to make food and still sell it.
An example for you. We booked Captain Jack's Restaurant (the Pirates of the Caribbean Restaurant) - it has a wonderful ambiance next to the ride lake - the boats drift past to volcanic booms. It serves Carribean food. Remember this - it's important. It has very few options for vegetarians.
“Excuzez-moi Monseuir? Est-ce-que possible pour prenez le sweet potato fries sans le king shrimp?”
“Non”.
When the meal arrives, not a single herb or spice appears to have been used. I remind you again that this is a Carribean restaurant.
For 9 people this meal cost over £400. Yes £400. It was the worst meal I have ever eaten. We collectively agreed that this was true for all of us, although my MiL wouldn't let me get the service charge taken off.
Other food in the parks is similarly dismal. The Mickey pizzas are probably the best food you will get.
Another example - on main street there is a beautiful looking bakery and coffee shop. Inside you will see some of the most god awful oversized soft and pasty pastries that you will ever see in France. There is a fake barista machine, and coffee/ hot chocolate comes out of a machine when the “baker” presses a button. It’s clearly enough to make any Frenchman want to declare war on America. The staff must draw straws to see who has the embarrassment of selling the putrid pastry.
I fail to understand why the American Disney bosses have failed to notice that they have built a theme park in a country that is famed for its boulangeries and just gone “nope. We are going to serve utter crap. That’s what tourists want!”
The final issue is that separating a Frenchman or French women from their Gauloise or electronic vape equivalent is tantamount to a declaration of war. The park has *many* smoking areas, and people walk along vaping outside of those areas without challenge. In France, smoking is a human right.
In summary, Disneyland Paris is very French, very expensive and does not live up to the US Parks. For a long holiday it’s often cheaper to fly to Orlando than it is to stay in a Disney Paris Hotel. For a mini break it’s a good bit of fun, but will clean out your wallet.
I thought I would share a review in case anyone is thinking of going...
Ah Disneyland Paris. Theme park of dreams.
Disneyland is to Paris as Luton is to London. Not actually really in Paris. If you arrive during the day you can get the TGV from Charles de Gaulle and it takes just 9 minutes. There is also the Magic Shuttle Coach which takes about 45 minutes to an hour depending on your hotel. if there are 9 of you arriving at 7.45PM your option is a taxi. This has the advantage of going to your hotel directly (45 mins) and also being cheaper for 9 people than the other methods of transport.
We stayed at Sequoia Lodge which was actually really nice. My only quibble is the lack of sockets in the rooms. They have fitted a little wireless charging block that has a USB port on it, but no sign of any power actually near the beds. The staff were pleasant and the hotel well appointed. The hotel food was also very good. Slightly more difficult for the finnicky - we ate at the Hunter's grill buffet. The older men loved the food - Venison two ways, trout, mackerel, pheasant, veal and lamb. The only sign of chicken was in chicken nuggets for the kids. Lots of veggie options too but for vegetarians that don't live mostly on potato, halloumi and cheddar cheese.
Anyway onto the Park itself. - if you have never been to a US Disney park, then I imagine that Disneyland Paris will blow you away. It does have much in common with its US relatives, but there is also a gulf that will never be crossed. You see the problem with Disneyland Paris is best summed up as being a microcosm of the relationship between the Americans and the French.
First - the good. Disneyland Paris (DLP) has been spruced up in recent years with many rides reconditioned and repainted. There are also new rides such the Spiderman Web ride and Ratatouille (when it’s actually working). The Imagineering is as impressive as it always is. The theming in the new Marvel area is superb and a lot of the learning from Florida has been brought across. For example, the Pym kitchen serves food which has been subjected to Pym Particle experimentation so it’s either oversized or undersized. It also has amazing cocktails - clearly inspired by the cocktail bar in Disney Orlando’s Star Wars area.
The processions are wonderful and the latest in fireworks, laser lighting, digital projection and drone tech brings main street and the castle to life every night. Talking of the castle, the sleeping dragon is fun and there is now a glassworks where artisans will make up a glass wand for you.
DLP has all the latest fast pass options, early access for guests staying on property and the option to “buy” a fastpass for single ride for money. There are also single rider lanes.
It has some advantages in that each day isn’t a 12 mile walk in 40 degree heat with almost no shelter. That said if you are not a fan of cold and rain, it’s probably not for you for a lot of the year. Rides, particularly in Hollywood Studios, are pleasingly close together.
Sounds great so far right?
The first major thing you will notice when visiting DLP is that for every ride, every menu, every instruction French is first. This was mandated by the French government. “Zis park is in France, epuis everysink must be in French. Viva la France!!”. Thusly we get Tom Holland dubbed into French with subtitles (our dual language translation machine natch) in the Web ride. Occasionally there are better approaches - for example in Tower of Terror you have a 50% chance of getting the original American narration and 50% chance of getting the French dubbing.
The second thing you will notice is that the French have employment rights. That’s right. You can’t just sack a French employee for not remembering to say “Have a great day” or just ignoring people. You can’t sack them for walking past a piece of litter and not picking it up. Also you have to pay them a decent wage which means that it is more costly to employ more people. Therefore you don’t always get immediate attention from cast members and the Park is noticeably less clean than the US parks. In the restaurants, wait staff will ignore you - they are not relying on tips to live.
You can mitigate this a little - making an effort to speak French automatically dials service up a notch.
The third thing you will notice is that there is clearly a covert war going on as regards the food. The American bosses want to serve food as they would serve it in America. The French want to serve good food. They can’t and therefore make the food as bad as it is humanly possible to make food and still sell it.
An example for you. We booked Captain Jack's Restaurant (the Pirates of the Caribbean Restaurant) - it has a wonderful ambiance next to the ride lake - the boats drift past to volcanic booms. It serves Carribean food. Remember this - it's important. It has very few options for vegetarians.
“Excuzez-moi Monseuir? Est-ce-que possible pour prenez le sweet potato fries sans le king shrimp?”
“Non”.
When the meal arrives, not a single herb or spice appears to have been used. I remind you again that this is a Carribean restaurant.
For 9 people this meal cost over £400. Yes £400. It was the worst meal I have ever eaten. We collectively agreed that this was true for all of us, although my MiL wouldn't let me get the service charge taken off.
Other food in the parks is similarly dismal. The Mickey pizzas are probably the best food you will get.
Another example - on main street there is a beautiful looking bakery and coffee shop. Inside you will see some of the most god awful oversized soft and pasty pastries that you will ever see in France. There is a fake barista machine, and coffee/ hot chocolate comes out of a machine when the “baker” presses a button. It’s clearly enough to make any Frenchman want to declare war on America. The staff must draw straws to see who has the embarrassment of selling the putrid pastry.
I fail to understand why the American Disney bosses have failed to notice that they have built a theme park in a country that is famed for its boulangeries and just gone “nope. We are going to serve utter crap. That’s what tourists want!”
The final issue is that separating a Frenchman or French women from their Gauloise or electronic vape equivalent is tantamount to a declaration of war. The park has *many* smoking areas, and people walk along vaping outside of those areas without challenge. In France, smoking is a human right.
In summary, Disneyland Paris is very French, very expensive and does not live up to the US Parks. For a long holiday it’s often cheaper to fly to Orlando than it is to stay in a Disney Paris Hotel. For a mini break it’s a good bit of fun, but will clean out your wallet.
