DIY Discoveries?

[simon_adams_uk]

An update on a previous tip: measure twice, go away, measure again, maybe have another measure, then cut...

 

[vernon]

If it's a job where you are responsible for the entire concept as opposed to something where you have no choice e.g. giving my balcony a wooden floor as opposed to repairing a leak, then think about the job for ages until you have finally settled on what you want. Then buy exactly the right tools you need for the job.

Of course none of this will apply if you have a nagging other half who wants it done quickly, in which case just do a botch job. This will keep her happy as it will give her something to nag about afterwards.

Once I bought the lino for the bathroom floor, my wife my wife incessantly nagged me to fit it. I'd spend hours sizing up the job and mentally rehearsing how to go about it but finally hacked the lino to fit loosle rounf the hanbasin and toilet pedastals and left it a few mm short. She then had to go and buy new lino and have it professionally fitted.

She clearly hadn't learnt from the rendering incident when she demanded that I abandon a fresh render mix to go and purchase some hoover bags. The mission became extended as I had to do a mini tour to find a stockist. The render was off when I returned and it languished, set in a heap, for fifteen months before I restarted the job.

Her piece de resistance was when I redecorated one of the rooms in the house - the most complex decorating job that I'd ever done. The room had a bay window, a circular window, sliding doors, two normal hinged doors, an arched alcove, a conventional alcove which meant that there was only one strip of wall paper that could be hung without having to trim it widthwise or heightwise. I took my time, stripped the old paper off. Used lining paper hung horizontally with all the trimming that the room entailed before hanging the wallpaper perfectly even if I do say so myself. Upon finishing the job, my wife decided that she couldn't life with the wallpaper/curtain combination and asked me to redecorate with a an embossed paper and magnolia paint.....

After the professional decorator commissioned at her expense, had finished the job, she had the nerve to tell me that he hadn't done as good a job as me.

I went away for the weekend. Alone.

To calm down.

 

[vernon]

An update on a previous tip: measure twice, go away, measure again, maybe have another measure, then cut...

The curse because you'd wrongly assumed that all of the doors were the same height.

 

[vernon]

An update on a previous tip: measure twice, go away, measure again, maybe have another measure, then cut...

Only to find that you'd cut it off the wrong end.

 

[taxing]

Have as many people with a trade in the family as you can. All we're missing from the full set is an electrician.

 

[Black Sheep]

Well, you could suggest that Mrs UD do it herself...

(speaking as a female, I think it rather pathetic that so many women still seem to have to wait for their man to do jobs like that)

My wife quite happily lets me get on with it, I think she prefers me to do it as she starts to get upset if it doesn't go to plan where as I just bodge it and bodge it well.

She likes to be left on her own to do flat-pack furnature and is like the woman from the hand cream adds that were on tv a few years ago, turn round and it's done.

 

[Fnaar]

After you've done a DIY job, stand back, take a look, whistle, and mutter "Ooh, you've had some right cowboys in here".

 

[paddy01]

If you're varnishing a floor, never, I repeat never, start at the door and work inwards.