Fraudulent Microsoft Engineer, it makes you laugh

[Arch]

The girl I spoke to said when she gets such calls (on her mobile) she simply tells them she doesn’t have a mobile phone. I tried this and it doesn’t half confuse the salesman

Excellent!

Although I once had to ring Orange to sort out my non working mobile phone, and the chap kept taking me round in circles turning it on and off again even though I knew what was wrong (the shop had diagnosed it, new sim card needed), and when eventually I mentioned the length and cost of the call he said "Oh, aren't you calling free from an Orange phone?"

Well, no, we've spent 45 mins establishing that my Orange phone doesn't work, haven't we?

 

[vernon]

The Microsoft scam seems to have got a second wind.

I have had three separate calls over the past fortnight, the most recent being this morning.

The callers are unflappable meven when directly accused of being lying, cheating, fraudulent munters.

 

[Bman]

I am actually a Certified Microsoft Engineer.... and these calls are almost enough for me to remove my home number from TPS and allow with-held numbers again, just so I can have some fun with them

 

[just jim]

I suppose they want to frighten you into visiting some scam site and pay stupid money for a "security update".
Nasty!

 

[Arch]

My boss had an amusing scam call the other day, someone wanting him to sign up to a lottery syndicate at £45 a month, just give me your bank details. Chap had a South African accent. When my boss demanded to know how they had his details (mobile number, plus correct address), this chap handed over to his manager, with a lot of 'passing a handset over' type noises on the phone. The manager had a strong mockney cockney accent, which gradually regressed to South African....

 

[TheDoctor]

I just ask them which of my computers they're ringing about - the Unix box or the Sun Sparcstation.
Next time, I might claim to have something truly obscure, like a PDP11 or a LEO 3.
I wonder if they've heard of an Analytical Engine?

 

[Will1985]

You can have a lot of fun with these guys if you know what you're doing.

Here's another:

"Switch your computer on for me please."

"O.k., I've done that."

"What's happening?"

"There is a penguin on the screen...what should I do now?"

 

[the snail]

I wonder if they've heard of an Analytical Engine?

That must be due for a security update by now, shirley?

 

[2PedalsTez]

My daughters' Leapfrog 'computer' had better be charged up. Imagine my embarrassment if I can't even power it up for these kind gentlemen, let alone play them a nice tune on it.

 

[Grizzly]

The Microsoft scam seems to have got a second wind.

I have had three separate calls over the past fortnight, the most recent being this morning.

The callers are unflappable meven when directly accused of being lying, cheating, fraudulent munters.

I got the Microsoft call last summer when I was in a holiday cottage in Skye, a point to note is this it is in the middle of nowhere with crap mobile signal and incoming land-line calls only.
The cottage phone rang and the guy gave me the computer spiel. I went along with it for about 5 min pretending to be upset and shocked about my faulty computer, I kept him going and he was promising me that he was honest guy and that I was having real problems. Anyway I finished him off with the question "how is my computer emailing you when I don't have internet access and even worse, I don't have a computer?" He then told me to go and do something to my mother and hung up.

Another one was at work, I'm a Paramedic based at Glasgow City Heliport. The emergency phone rang and I answered, a guy starts blabbing on about some remarkable offer, you know the once in a life time thing. Fed up with the emergency phone receiving cold calls I started in a rage. "Do you know who you are calling?" I shouted at the poor underpaid worker, before he had a chance to answer I started again. "This is a Helicopter Emergency Service and you have called us on the emergency phone number!". " I I I I'm s s sorry" he replied, "I didn't know". "You didn't know?" I replied, "don't you think you should know who you are calling? I know have a Pilot and two Paramedics in helicopter, which is running, waiting to be told where the emergency is. The Pilot has already spoken to Glasgow Airport and they are diverting all flights to let us through. I recommend you get this number removed from your system or it will be a Police matter." All I got back was "Yes Sir".

You cant stop them calling so you might as well have fun.

 

[PBancroft]

Most dodgy sales calls seem to have tailed off lately, at least to our house. I still occasionally get one at home, but they're usually BT being annoying and even the dodgy ones aren't as fun as they once were. I get a lot of those text messages along the lines of Urgent! If you took out a bank loan prior to 2007 then you are entitled to £2900 in compensation. To claim reply 'YES' or FREEMSG: Our records indicate that you may be entitled to £3760 for the accident you had.


Sadly they're no fun to deal with.

A few years ago I did have a go at stringing along a few 419 scammers. I might see if I can dig out the page where I posted my attempts.

 

[snorri]

Here's another:

"Switch your computer on for me please."

"O.k., I've done that."

I got that one today, but I answered "NO", and remained silent. There was no further comment from the caller, but a long delay until she hung-up.

 

[Flying Dodo]

I am actually a Certified Microsoft Engineer.... and these calls are almost enough for me to remove my home number from TPS and allow with-held numbers again, just so I can have some fun with them

They're all from overseas, so the TPS is irrelevant. I've been registered with them for years, and I'm plagued by these calls. The latest one yesterday claimed to be from Dell, so I just said I don't have a Dell.