Discussion in 'CycleChat Cafe' started by Joni, 25 Jan 2008.
Happy haggis munching one and all from Joni
They will all be getting rat faced later, so expect some real gibberish on the forum this evening......
What's the generally accepted time to start on the single malts?
That time has now passed. You should be at kilt-lifting level of drunkenness now (yer ain mind, nane o that funny business on the bard's day!). By lunchtime you should be involved in your first punch-up and that will clear the way for an afternoon and evening of emotional openness.
For me, it was yesterday! (due to other commitments tonight, my mates and I had an early Burns Supper last night) Not a drop of Scottish blood among us, as far as we know, but hey, I like embracing other cultures....
I hope someone addressed the puddin!
How can it have been Burns night at 08:51 ?
Spindrift has a joke for us. Spinny? Where are you Spinny?
Well, as Spinny is not forthcoming. Here we go:-
An Englishman is being shown around a Scottish hospital.
At the end of his visit, he is shown into a ward with a number of
patients who show no obvious signs of injury. He goes to examine the
first man he sees, and the man proclaims:
Fair fa' yer honest, sonsie face,
Great chieftain e' the puddin' race!
Aboon them a' ye tak your place,
painch tripe or thairm:
Weel are ye wordy o' a grace
as lang's my arm.
The Englishman, somewhat taken aback, goes to the next patient, and
immediately the patient launches into:
Some hae meat, and canna eat,
And some wad eat that want it,
But we hae meat and we can eat,
And sae the Lord be thankit.
This continues with the next patient:
Wee sleekit cow'rin tim'rous beastie,
O what a panic's in thy breastie!
Thou need na start awa sae hasty,
wi' bickering brattle.
I wad be laith to run and chase thee,
wi' murdering prattle!"
"Well," the Englishman mutters to his Scottish colleague, "I see you
saved the psychiatric ward for the last."
"Nay, nay," the Scottish doctor corrected him,
"this is the Serious Burns unit."
Thanks Wafflycat - that's brilliant.
I completely messed up and forgot what date it is, we've got toad in the hole for tea. Mrs C might get treated to haggis on sunday.
Are yoo shayin' ah'm drunkd? Ah'll tek yis aw! 'mon then!
Alas I cannot claim to be the wit behind the joke.
Spinny posted it elsewhere.
I had a bit of a go, but my accent kept going all Geordie. I should have tried it in Geordie, then no doubt I'd have sounded Scottish.
Separate names with a comma.