Ideas to Improve Sport

[Drago]

Football - anyone laying on the ground clutching their extremities in (usually feigned) agony should be given the next three games off on zero pay to recover.

F1 - at least one pit stop must be done by KwikFit while the driver sits in a dingy waiting room reading a two year old campervan magazine.

Cricket - at random points in the game the ball should be briefly substituted with a live hand grenade.

Marathon - competitors should eat nothing by Marathon bars for a week prior to each event.

Bowls - competitors should wear 8" high heels.

Curling - the broom should be replaced with a pickaxe.

 

[Drago]

800 metre relay - a random sample of competitors water bottles to be spiked with fast acting laxative.

 

[BigSid]

As a golf course is a deliberately wilful misuse of a rifle range make it dual use. Should speed up the golf.

 

[Drago]

Shot put - the shot should be replaced with one or those comedy cartoon bombs with the little fuse poking out the top.

 

[Drago]

Sumo - top level competitors should wear lacy women's thongs. Reigning world champions easily identified by the sprt bra.

 

[secretsqirrel]

Boxing - airbag helmet
Boxing - airbag body suit
Boxing - airbag gloves

 

[PeteXXX]

Boxing: an ACME magnet in each glove with magnets that can change polarity on the opponents head guard so a punch has the surprise af being very hard (and sticking there) or being repelled straight back at the boxer throwing said punch.

 

[PeteXXX]

F1: Figure of 8 course to add a bit of interest to the spectacle.

 

[Ming the Merciless]

Hurdles - the top of the hurdle should be wrapped in razor wire

 

[Mo1959]

4 x 100m relay with a baton that explodes if you don’t get under 10 seconds per leg.

 

[Ming the Merciless]

Long jump - the first 8 meters should be water with piranhas in there.

 

[Ming the Merciless]

Steeple chase - they need to climb real steeples.

 

[Drago]

Cross country running - all competitors must wear rainbow T shirts and complete the course around Turnberry golf course.

 

[a.twiddler]

@Drago posted "Marathon - competitors should eat nothing by Marathon bars for a week prior to each event."

It would be an interesting new sport to see who could invent a time machine first to go back and get some since they've been called Snickers for years. (Though I much prefer the name "Marathon"). Although sometime in the last couple of years there were some limited edition Marathons available. Like just about everything, I thought they used to be bigger.

 

[Stevo 666]

Controversial one? Road cycling - riders should be allowed to try and get their competitors off the road by giving them a good boot or hitting them with a big stick.