Ideas to Improve Sport

[Dogtrousers]

Tiddlywinks...

No, I can't improve on it. It is the perfect sport.

 

[Mad Doug Biker]

In sailing, there should be a 'Pirate' ship that tries to catch the boat in last place. Once caught, they then chase after the next one in last place, etc etc.
Extra points awarded to crew with the best fighting moves to ward off said 'Pirates' during the attempted catching.

Somalis only need apply.

 

[Mad Doug Biker]

In any sport where they sing the national anthem beforehand, players of the corresponding team must perform said anthem with the playing of musical instruments, whilst the spectators sing along.

 

[Mad Doug Biker]

In fishing, not only should the weight of the fish be measured and scored, but the anglers need to cook their catch and produce the best dishes to a group of judges.

 

[Mad Doug Biker]

In Equestrian events, the horse should get a medal too.

 

[Dogtrousers]

In Equestrian events, the horse should get a medal too.

And in the event of an accident the horse should be rushed to hospital and the rider should be shot.

 

[Reynard]

In fishing, not only should the weight of the fish be measured and scored, but the anglers need to cook their catch and produce the best dishes to a group of judges.

I'll quite happily have a crack at that. I used to fish (albeit not competitively), and I'm a dab hand at rattling the old saucepans.

 

[PeteXXX]

The ice rink surface is to be set at 65°c so the skaters tootsies don't get chilly.

 

[Moon bunny]

A new form of triathlon, participants must first win a board game of the judges’ choice, before setting of on a fourteen and one quarter mile bicycle ride, at the finishing line they take part in a boxing match, ie. the first finisher, fights the second, loser of that 3 round bout fights the third finisher and so on. Anyone riding a bike with chrome socks gets a bye in the boxing.

 

[Moon bunny]

All sports: any competitor who gives a boring post event interview forfeits any medal, cup or other prize awarded.

 

[DRM]

Water Polo- To be played on horses with specially designed scuba gear

 

[Dogtrousers]

Athletics: Distances of foot races not to be disclosed before the start. Just before the gun an official will announce the distance which could be anything from 100m to the marathon with hurdles.

 

[Drago]

800M hurdles - Russian competitors to jump a 1:10 scale replica of the Berlin Wall while being chased by hungry malinois dogs.

 

[Mad Doug Biker]

800M hurdles - Russian competitors to jump a 1:10 scale replica of the Berlin Wall while being chased by hungry malinois dogs.

The modern equivalent might be having to avoid a group of enraged Ukrainians.

See also Isreil* and Palestine.



* - I can't even bring myself to respect them with a proper spelling.

 

[Drago]

Hig jump - bar to be replaced with high voltage cables. Many record jumps anticipated.