Joint accounts

[Sandra6]

Sounds like you're getting a bargain - milk is definitely cheaper than running a car

Hmm, I have to "run" the children - they are definitely more expensive than the car!

Separate account holders - how do you cope with balancing expenditures with uneven incomes?

For us marriage is about equality and trust in all things, separate finances would imply lack of trust. At various times one or other of us has had a significantly higher income, first me them my wife, the changes did not require any "renegotiation of terms".

Touche! When we had a big difference between incomes (while I was at home with the children) we split the bills accordingly -with Mr6 covering the lion's share and I pretty much just did the shopping. Now we're almost equal with income, so pretty much have a 50/50 split of expenses. He pays for all the big stuff - mortgage, rent, car, pension. I do the every day stuff, electricity bill, water rates, food.
I wouldn't say it implies lack of trust for us, we both accept that I can't be trusted with money!

 

[brodiej]

Hmm, I have to "run" the children - they are definitely more expensive than the car!

Good point

 

[PK99]

I wouldn't say it implies lack of trust for us, we both accept that I can't be trusted with money!

That's why I said "For us".

When we bought our first joint house, my then fiancée put up more of the deposit than I did. We shook hands that if we split she would get X/£55k of the profit, and we would split the rest. Nothing legal, just trust.

 

[jugglingphil]

Separate account holders - how do you cope with balancing expenditures with uneven incomes?

For us marriage is about equality and trust in all things, separate finances would imply lack of trust. At various times one or other of us has had a significantly higher income, first me them my wife, the changes did not require any "renegotiation of terms".

I don't think separate finances mean lack of trust, quite the opposite. But that's viewpoints for you.

My wife and I earn differently. In essence everything is shared, so if I pay more, there is no issue. We both have a little money left each month to buy things we may want (or not) without having to justify anything to each other. All bills etc are paid.

There isn't going to be a right and a wrong way for everyone. However it's important that it's the right way for you.

 

[snapper_37]

Separate accounts where our salaries go into. Shared household bills.

Joint savings account and a separate savings account each (for birthdays, christmasses, new bikes, bike bits and stuff etc).

Worked ok for 13 years so far.

 

[ASC1951]

As I said, that doesn't matter. An account can be in joint names, but you can declare 90% yours one year and none yours the next year. As long as it all declared HMRC doesn't care.

Not quite correct. You can only do that if you are married or civil partners. http://www.hmrc.gov.uk/manuals/saimmanual/saim2420.htm

 

[cd365]

We have a joint account for bills, mortgage etc and separate accounts for personal spending

 

[summerdays]

Joint account holders - what do you do when it's your other half's birthday or at christmas??
Isn't it like using their money to buy them a present?

For me the money part isn't the point - it doesn't actually matter what the value of the present is and how much I or he contributed to it, it is the fact that they remember and that they put a little thought into the present - though sometimes he just asks me what I want . I ask him when it is an electrical present but there will always be some little present that is a surprise that I have seen that he might like.

 

[SpokeyDokey]

Our simple view of life is that we are married and we feast or famine together - we have two salaries, one pension and some investment income - the whole lot belongs to both of us.

We do not have any rules about who can spend how much and on what. If my wife wants something she gets it and likewise me. For larger purchases we usually out of courtesy let each other know what is happening. Neither of us would be bothered if one of us forgot.

Tbh, and not wishing to offend, we find it really odd when married couples manage their own income and go down the, to us, comical route of one party paying for certain things and likewise the other.

My S-I-L and B-I-L married for 32 years even lend each other money.

Each to their own of course and I guess some people see it as an independence issue.

 

[PK99]

Our simple view of life is that we are married and we feast or famine together - we have two salaries, one pension and some investment income - the whole lot belongs to both of us.

We do not have any rules about who can spend how much and on what. If my wife wants something she gets it and likewise me. For larger purchases we usually out of courtesy let each other know what is happening. Neither of us would be bothered if one of us forgot.

Tbh, and not wishing to offend, we find it really odd when married couples manage their own income and go down the, to us, comical route of one party paying for certain things and likewise the other.
.

One or other of us will convene the "Capital Expenditure Committee" (quorum 2) over supper re large items or inform the other that the "capital expenditure -small items sub committee" (quorum 1) has met and approved expenditure. A silly game, part of the day to day communication and sharing that has kept us together for 32 years.

Neither of us queries (other than by smile and raised eyebrow) what the other spends on general 'stuff'.

Money is plentiful now, but has not always been, in 1990 I earned 60% of the total, my job moved and we chose not to. The "one pot" principle served us well then and has since.

 

[Arch]

One or other of us will convene the "Capital Expenditure Committee" (quorum 2) over supper re large items or inform the other that the "capital expenditure -small items sub committee" (quorum 1) has met and approved expenditure. A silly game, part of the day to day communication and sharing that has kept us together for 32 years.

I like that.

 

[Night Train]

When I was married we didn't have a joint account, though we discussed it.
When we bought the house I paid for the deposit, the bills, the repairs, the renovation costs and half the food bills. She paid the mortgage, which was less then the cost of the bills and running costs of the house.

When we split up (less then a year after committing to buy the house) she insisted that the value of the house wholly belonged to her, as she paid the mortgage, and that all of my contributions laid me no claim to the house, despite joint ownership. She wanted to sell the house and keep the money. She also insisted that I should give her a deposit so she could buy another house, and pay her living expenses after the divorce. However, she also earned over 4 times my income.
It took a lot of effort and a good solicitor to stop her taking the house. I now have the house and I didn't have to give her anything in the divorce. Interestingly, in the process of divorcing, I held a sole mortgage of over 8 times my income for a while.

I am weary of joint accounts, but I am also equally weary of not having joint accounts.
I do, however, trust Arch.

TBH, I am happy to just pay as needs paying and to tell each other of spending as it happens, even for presents and surprises.

 

[Cletus Van Damme]

Having been in a terrible marriage that has had 2 break-ups the last permanent, and both times got my joint account cleaned out I have to say never ever again.

 

[rvw]

Joint accounts here. Anything else would be, well, weird. Admittedly it helps that we're very comfortably off, that neither of us is particularly good at spending money on a whim, and that R is an accountant so is very capable at keeping the books. And that we trust each other and are quite happy to talk about difficult subjects.

I refer my dear husband to his post on another thread...

R emerged this morning reasonably bright-eyed, and made it out to her rehearsal on time. I stayed in bed this morning and have spent the afternoon playing with my new toy.

(Admittedly, this wasn't "on a whim" as it has been planned for some time: but it shows that when we do make up our minds to spend money, we can be just as indulgent as anyone else!)

 

[slowwww]

We have a joint account through which goes the mortgage, all utilities, council tax, insurances etc. I transfer money to cover this from my sole account into which my salary is paid.

All other expenditure (food, petrol, socialising, clothes and other things for the kids) goes on a joint credit card which my wife pays off in full monthly from her sole account, thus building up good loyalty points

My element of the costs is about 30% higher than hers, but then I earn about 30% more than her.

We both have our own ISAs, savings etc, and so when it comes to spending money on the house, holidays etc, we decide who wishes to contribute how much to each project.

That's all open and above board, however I spend far more on gadgets and tools than I tell her, and I know that she spends more on shoes, clothes etc than she tells me, but we have seemingly got to a place where we both tacitly acknowledge this happens, but as long as this doesn't impact on joint finances then we choose to ignore it!

It also means that I can spend money on her without feeling that she’s in part paying for it!