Kitchen Kalamities

[mistyoptic]

Mrs Misty’s uncle was once tasked with making dinner. Raided the freezer and managed to serve apple pie with gravy and two veg

 

[Profpointy]

Mrs PP, a rather good cook to be fair, albeit, she "cheats" and follows recipes, was cooking a Rick Stein concoction, and asked me if 200g of chiles sounded a bit much "f*** yes!" was my response, so she cut it in half, which is still a "f*** me, how much?" quantity. Needless to say the meal per se was inedible, but we froze it in small portions to "seed" subsequent dishes with chilleness. I assume it was a misprint or so something as I assume Stein must have some sort of clue

 

[Hugh Manatee]

Not really kitchen but still food based. Mrs Manatee and I headed off to Buxton for our 20th wedding Aniversary to stay in some large hotel there. Dinner wasn't the great experience we were hoping for. It was a serve yourself sort of thing. The wife couldn't find the soup starter. I went off and found a large toureen complets with accompanied bread rolls. Being the gent I am, I ladled two bowl fulls, grabbed a couple of rolls and headed back to the table in triumph!
The feeling of accomplishment very quickly disappeared when we took our first spoonfuls.

I had collected two bowls of custard rather than parsnip soup!

 

[Hugh Manatee]

Mrs PP, a rather good cook to be fair, albeit, she "cheats" and follows recipes, was cooking a Rick Stein concoction, and asked me if 200g of chiles sounded a bit much "f*** yes!" was my response, so she cut it in half, which is still a "f*** me, how much?" quantity. Needless to say the meal per se was inedible, but we froze it in small portions to "seed" subsequent dishes with chilleness. I assume it was a misprint or so something as I assume Stein must have some sort of clue

Reminds of of the Two Ronnies sketch where the Indian TV chef apologises to a viewer who misheard One table spoon of chilli fro one dustbin full!

 

[Eziemnaik]

My sister in law just messaged The Fragrant MrsP to tell her she and some children in her care made a cake, when licking the mixing spoon one of the kids said it didn’t taste very nice. While the cake was baking she noticed when clearing up that she used garlic butter in the mixture.

45 years ago, on my first day as a trainee chef, I was told to keep an eye on 48 profiteroles, take them out in 20 minutes the chef said. 6 hours later he asked me when I was going to take them out of the oven. They were like little charcoal bricks. Didn’t do that again.

Tell us about your culinary cock ups, your baking blunders and your frying faux-pas.

I left once 50l of brown stock for demi next to the potwash...dishwasher cleaned it very well

 

[SpokeyDokey]

Does this count as a Kitchen Cock-up?

About 40 years ago, when my future outweighed my past, I cooked Russian Liver for a couple of guests who, it turns out, hated liver.

Our friends from the Indian sub-continent bailed me out.

 

[EltonFrog]

I’ve been reminded of another balls up by the pizza oven thread.
First time I made Pizza. The dough, the tomato sauce prepared all the fillings, transferred it to the oven but on the way it slid off the tray into a messy pile on the floor, where Nettiethedog made a start on it.
We went to Pizza Express instead.

 

[Mike_P]

Couldn't find the salt so the last batch of shortbread I made had a pinch of rock salt, whole lot disintegrated. Single malt with a spoon of shortbread is different