Obituary - Norman "Phaeton" Trainspotter, 1903-2020.
Norman Trainspotter was born on 12th January 1903. At age 2 he was up t'chimneys, and at age 4 was down t'pit. He was conscripted to fight during WW1, and quickly rose through the ranks to the rank of Oberstleutnant, and was awarded the Iron Cross second class for rewwiring a wiper motor on a land mine.
Too old to serve in WWII, he sat out the war selling ladies nylons on the black market, and was twice arrested for drunkenly wandering around in public wearing them. Sentenced to mandatory hormone treatment to curb is perversions, he discovered a love for taking unfinished kit cars and, well, finishing them.
He sadly passed away this morning when he was thrown from his bicycle and landed under the wheels of a passing Jago Samurai. Affectionately known as Phaeton to his friends, it is his dying wish that he buried in a coffin made from old Marlin Berlinetta bonnets. He will be sadly missed.