See i've had the opportunity to have a single mouse in the house. the wife went to a cottage get away with her friends a while back, one of them had a hen night etc.
anyhoo turns out she'd brought back a mouse in her backpack, why on earth it was in there i don't know but she unknowingly brought it all the way back from deepest darkest wales, unpacked a few clothes and dumped the bag on the bed wide open.
about 1am she wakes me up and says "Pete i can here something under the wardrobe"
"no you can't" says I "Go back to sleep"
a few minutes later
"pete, i think we have a mouse, its under the wardrobe"
"there's no bloody mouse go back to sleep"
a few more minutes later
"thats it, i'm telling you there's a mouse!!!"
So up i jump out of bed and make a bee line for the wardrobe, on go the lights and i start shaking it around shouting "Look there's nothing here!!"
at which point a small mouse from the wilds of wales makes a dash out from under the wardrobe, across my bare foot and into the room next door where my 6 month old son is asleep.
i managed "oh look, a mouse..." (to this day she's never let me forget this incident i might add)
so this little blighter is zooming around my sons room, now all we have in here is a changing unit, a cot and a double seat couch thing (actually a damn neat idea for feeding in the night) its all raised off the floor too so i can see the little welsh git under the couch.
little man goes into our room with the wife, thankfully #1 is a heavy sleeper, cot goes on top of couch so its out the way.
now if i move hte couch he'll just run under the changing unit (big wooden thing with draws and a flat top) so i figure i'll have to get him whilst he's under the couch.
so out come my Jyo and Bokken, both are training weapons for my aikido classes.
the jyo is a 4ft staff, the bokken is a practice sword, i put the jyo underneath the couch and one end and i put the bokken underneath the couch at the other.
i then sharply bring them together in the middle with a very loud THWACK!
using my torch i peer under and out pops a furry whiskered nose from between the jyo and bokken... "WTF?" shouts i, and withdraw my weapons. of course the bokken is based on the samurai sword or Kitana, it has a CURVED blade... damn mouse just sat where the bokken didn't meet the jyo...
plan 2, get angry...
i prop up the couch and swat at the little blighter but as predicted earlier he runs under the changing unit.
by this time i've had enough so i stomp into my room and get an airsoft pistol... i used to airsoft a fair bit and had a Glock 18c by KWA. 26 round magazine gas fed, single or full auto modes...
a come back with it fully loaded (practiced load takes 2 mins) and peer under hte unit to find he's gone...
when i left hte room i closed the door and stuffed a towel under it so he couldn't escape, i look under the couch, i check for holes... i peer behind the changing unit...
Lo and behold its gone all welsh mountain mission impossible on me, the mouse now is edging its way up between the wall and unit, 2 paws on the wall and 2 paws on the unit.
A perfect shot? Bring on the firepower!!! I line it up and pull the trigger the satisfying recoil suddenly stops mid cycle and the gun jams.. didn't actually get a shot off in disgust i chucked the pistol on the couch where, according to the laws of sod it actually un-jams and goes off, whereby i have to duck to avoid taking one in the eye.
after re-leaving the pistol of its magazine i went back and just shifted the unit, mouse runs off accross the room to a corner and sits patiently awaiting its doom.
i've been at this for about an hour and a half now, literally cat and mouse so i just heft my little torch and lob it at the mouse out of exasperation, whereby i clock it on the head.
after that i managed to chase it down easy enough and trap it in a box.
i popped it outside in the back garden in a quiet spot and it scarpered sharpish.
finally got to bed around 4am, as #1 needed a feed and i had to fiddle with my pistol which from that point on discharged perfectly for a number of years yet i didn't actually do owt to it...
long and short of this whole post is thus:
If i had that much trouble with 1 effing mouse consider using a bloody nuke NOW!
pete
