Sorry to hear that and fully understand your feelings.Try to have a nice xmas.Itll never be the same but your family will make it special for you.Good luck for the future
I lost my mam and dad 13 and 12 years ago respectively. Today I went out on my bike on my own to my dads grave and said hello, my mam was cremated so I couldnt do the same, sadly, but she was in my thoughts.
I feel your pain, but it does get easier with time.
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