Message from God, hijacked!

[Tin Pot]

People getting riled over the belongings of a dead person is so sad.

 

[w00hoo_kent]

People getting riled over the belongings of a dead person is so sad.

People can get surprisingly greedy when there's a big pot of money staring at them, and it doesn't have to be that big to be big.

 

[Vapin' Joe]

People getting riled over the belongings of a dead person is so sad.

But so common. Nothing causes family resentment like the scramble for the trinkets left behind.

 

[ayceejay]

Cue that scene in Zorba the Greek when black clad neighbours boost everything except the bed the poor woman was dying in.

 

[Tin Pot]

People can get surprisingly greedy when there's a big pot of money staring at them, and it doesn't have to be that big to be big.

In my experience it doesn't have to be a pot of money. I think it's the combination of anger and frustration at losing someone and the confronting of ones own mortality that drives out all the conflict. The fact their is a house, or a set of clothes, to focus that on can be secondary.

We've just had a death in the family, yesterday, I'm hoping these resentful feelings don't arise. But we're in a different country, and I can see people getting upset if we aren't on site as quickly as they desire.

 

[w00hoo_kent]

Hope it all goes as well as it can. This is very much a time for the people still alive to be made as comfortable as possible in my book. Not beholden to the person who has died. I guess not everyone thinks that way.

There's no guarantee it'll be antagonistic, it's really all down to the people, but it's a horrible situation to be in and can effect people in ways you didn't expect. My mothers actual death was after a month in bed dying from cancer, so while it was sudden it wasn't a shock, if that makes sense. Similarly both of my wife's parents died in hospital and it was kind of expected, in her fathers case almost hoped for as he was in to dementia and wasn't a nice person to be around in the last few days of his life. The aftermath was very easy for her, few people in the Will and one to fall back on, her father, who went last, had done everything he needed to to make it very easy (handy because some people involved had the possibility of being a bit 'grabby' but couldn't be). As mentioned above, my mothers was tougher. When my father goes it'll be odd, I probably won't know he is ill (he is in the Philippines, we don't talk much) and may not be told before everything is over and done with. We've agreed he will be buried wherever he dies and statistically it's much less likely he'll die on a visit back to the UK. I see him in 'stop motion' now, which is hard to deal with as he is much older and infirm each time it happens.

 

[swee'pea99]

People can get surprisingly greedy when there's a big pot of money staring at them, and it doesn't have to be that big to be big.

When my great aunt died, my uncle, who was executor, asked if there was anything specific I would like - everyone could take one thing from her house. I mentioned that the only time I could remember really spending any time with my aunt was one time I'd been up that way (she lived at the other end of the country) and we had a very nice chat over tea and biscuits, in the course of which I remarked on the wee mouse carved into the leg of the table. She then told me all about it, and it turned out it had been made by a guy who was famous for these little mice. Other than family Christmases, it was the only association I really had with her, so it would be nice if I could have that. Apparently it was 'already spoken for'. By him, it later turned out. The main beneficiary of the (not insignificant) estate, and a pretty wealthy man in his own right. I never entirely forgave him for that.

 

[Sara_H]

How? As i understand it, if you die intestate, your estate goes to your spouse, if no spouse, it goes to your children, no kids, then your parents, no parents, then siblings, no siblings, they start looking at cousins, nephews, nieces...

My dad died intestate, everything went to my mum in the end, but it was a complete nightmare.
She was a young widow, house and two young children to sort out, no job and no access to the household account which was solely in my dads name.
Fortunately relatives were able to help out financially or we'd have all starved to death!

 

[slowmotion]

If they're not married or civilly partnered, then there is no automatic inheritance between couples, irrespective of how long they've lived together or whether they have children together.

I know a few unmarried couples who have lived together for decades and have had children. Only when their accountants pointed out that a large chunk of their wealth would go to HMRC did they make a dash for the altar. Very sensible.

 

[Brains]

Stig Larsson, the author of the Dragon Tattoo trilogy of books and films, died early and unexpectedly without leaving a will.
His partner of 30 years got nothing, and lives in a one bed flat and has to work after she should have retired.
His brother and father got the lot and will never have to work again

Not making a will is a really nasty thing to do to the people (or cats homes) that you love.

 

[Gravity Aided]

Most men in our family die at around 60, but my father carried on until 83, and had a will from when he was drafted to the wars in 1942. He amended over the years , and when he turned 75, started distributing his assets to his heirs, to cut down on or eliminate inheritance taxes. Well planned exit., God bless Him.

 

[ufkacbln]

That's the point, start looking. It holds everything up and is open to higher charges from solicitors and HMRC are likely to chip in their 2 penn'orth if the estate is a reasonable size. It's common sense to make things easy for your nearest and dearest after you go.

The other point about a will is that even if everything obviously goes to one person without doubt, it makes it easier to deal with bank accounts, pensions etc.

Those were the two reasons we asked my father to sign one.

It was worth it because we were able to get my mother access to his bank accounts and pension without the need for lawyers or others to act on or behalf, and without delays

 

[ufkacbln]

Mr WD left his half to me. Now all I have to do is collect it.

Clients "instruct" their solicitors

In my case the wife "instructed" me!

 

[ufkacbln]

Miss Goodbody has first dibs on the Vicar's altar candles.

You can't beat a good solid oak dibber

 

[Mad Doug Biker]

I've left all of my worldly goods to @Mad Doug Biker and it is buried in.....argggggghhhhh

Wasn't there a joke like that in one of the Monty Python films, The Holy Grail I think??

'I can reveal that it's location is AAAARRRRGGGGHHHHH!'


'AAAAARRRGGGHHHH??'


'That's what it says....'