Minding my own business on my bike and get called a

[swee'pea99]

Just went out for my lunch ride near Henley, Oxfordshire, just entering the town, at a fair pace, car goes past and shouts "oy you ****ing *****er" , blue Peugeot 207, no Reg taken.

I mean, why?

Just why?

I was going to pursue but had already committed to a turn with a tipper truck nearby, so lost him.

What car does your wife drive? Just asking, like.

 

[Fab Foodie]

Cyclewanker ...

 

[Accy cyclist]

I just give them a "you are a w@nker" sign. They seem to know this fact as they never take it further and if you catch them up at the lights they pretend to wipe their dashboards down or something equally pitiful! Pathetic creatures they are!

 

[Doseone]

Were you in full Team Sky kit?

 

[John the Monkey]

Thaaaaaaaat's Britain!

/jazz hands

I quite often get "Bike self-gratification artist", usually after the "Bus self-gratification artist" episode of Inbetweeners has been repeated.

"Write that one yourself, did you mate?" is usually my response.

 

[Rooster1]

What car does your wife drive? Just asking, like.

Goof point, perhaps she was with her bf

 

[Rooster1]

Were you in full Team Sky kit?

Err, no - lolz

 

[vickster]

I had some spotty yoof give me some sort of random hand signal from his mate's Laxo...I so wanted to ask him if his mum was proud of her pizza faced, thick as pig s***, virgin son...

 

[Moodyman]

I guess things is different in France.

Sure are. We just got back from a French tour and got numerous horn beeps of encouragement and waves from cars.

Very courteous and patient driving too.

 

[Crackle]

And just to add some balance, I was riding through some town in the small hours (I was on a brevet) when I saw three lads on the footpath walking away from me. Oh here we go, I thought gloomyly sensing the inevitable. They heard my approach and turned.... and began applauding and calling out encouragement.... chapeau! allez! I guess things is different in France.

They were probably on there way to a strike or a riot.

 

[fossyant]

I've taken to sticking my tongue out people that either honk the horn or make signs. Really upsets them for some reason

 

[ColinJ]

I've taken to sticking my tongue out people that either honk the horn or make signs. Really upsets them for some reason

The passenger who screamed abuse at me didn't look like the kind of person that I wanted to have a 'roadside discussion' with, and there was the driver to back him up. The last thing I want on a Sunday afternoon ride is to annoy some already angry and aggressive muscular meatheads!

I can't risk being beaten about the head when on warfarin - one serious punch could cause intracranial bleeding which might easily kill me!

I'll try to stick to inflicting lethal imaginary cartoon violence upon abusers ...

 

[DaveReading]

I find that blowing a kiss at abusers really puts them off their stride.

 

[SteCenturion]

My reply to Peugot boy (if I got the chance) would have gone something like -

"Your wife just phoned & said, can you take her car back please" or

"Go & take it out on your boyfriend"

Something like that.

 

[SteCenturion]

I find that blowing a kiss at abusers really puts them off their stride.

That's a belter, I do that to blokes who look like they walk as if carrying 2 carpets, they seem to get rattled easily.