My father

[PaulB]

is a refuse operative. He wears the headwear of the refuse operative and sports leg-wear that makes ladies utter an oath. He is domiciled in an apartment provided by the local corporation. He somewhat resembles a banana wearing his clumpy stout footwear and had such difficulty lifting them on to his feet that he dubbed them flower taps.

 

[numbnuts]

 

[rich p]

I think you meant 'refuse'

My dog's got no nose...........

 

[beanzontoast]

Quite.

Have I mentioned - I am being pursued by the penumbra of an orbiting satellite some 250,000 miles away from Earth?

 

[gbb]

A guy i knew was quite into dope smoking..several of us sat there one day and he piped up
'it's the martians'

eh ?

'Its the bloody martians..they're taking all the water'

[tumbleweed mode]...we looked at each other [/tumbleweed mode]

 

[Fnaar]

If you were acquainted with Peggy Sue
Then you would indeed be well aware of why it is that I present to the world a sad demeanour
u-hoh Pegworthy, my Pegworthy Susan

 

[GentleBenn]

My collegue and i had to move a very large object,after much deliberation fredric said we should start immediately. One either side and take things sedately,we tried to move it ,could not even raise it, we were still at the same juncture as before, by then it was break time , and we both had a very nice cup of earl grey !

Because it was such a problem Fredric thought we should employ the services of Charles ,who happened to be below stairs, after much exertion,and vocal dissatisfaction, we were still at the same juncture as previous, so we all had a splendid cup of Darjeeling.......

 

[TVC]

What is wrong with you? Do you not respect me?
What are you doing? Why do you look so unhappy?
Things are not as dire as they seem, in fact this is quite an agreeable location.
Please stop complaining.

 

[Velorum]

I have had a relationship with a young woman
Her Christian name is Julie
Unfortunately, yesterday she stated
(Whilst we were watching television)
And this is indeed what she stated
Take head of these words Jonathan; I have formed a strong emotional attachment to you
But there is another gentleman that I feel sexually attracted to
I would rather not engage in sexual relations on a concurrent basis
I will thus have to end our relationship
Please identify this gentleman I requested
She stated that his name was Gordon
That homosexual! I stated in a somewhat distressed state
You confirmed that this was the case but contested my assertion that he was in fact a homosexual
(In fact his testosterone level is much higher than yours)
Here we go, two three four
Such was the degree of my distress that I wept
For the duration of a short walk to the local take away fast food outlet
After leaving said emporium I noted that Gordon
Was standing nearby waiting for some available public transport
(Question: who was with him? Yes, that is correct it was indeed Julie)
The lady in question is in my view rather inconsiderate
To end her relationship with me due to an emotional attachment to Gordon
Probably based upon the fact that his physical appearance is superior to mine
And also owing to his acute fashion sense
However, I know that he is two sandwiches short of a picnic
Gordon’s is a bit ‘George Raft’, Gordon is not playing with a full deck
Here we go, two three four
The lady in question is of easy virtue, the gentleman is a sycophant
She is a prostitute; he is of very low value
He is most certainly a homosexual
By no stretch of the imagination could this be described as an equitable arrangement
By no stretch of the imagination could this be described as an equitable arrangement
By no stretch of the imagination could this be described as an equitable arrangement
I am rather distressed by this
I ought to proffer physical violence
Unfortunately he is much larger than me
I will give due consideration to entering into an arrangement where my good friend Barry will physically assault him on my behalf
Though it has just occurred to me that Barry is also a friend of Gordon’s and in consequence may well be unlikely to enter into such an arrangement
I have become indifferent to this situation
I have become indifferent to this situation
I have become indifferent to this situation
I have become indifferent to this situation

 

[TheDoctor]

The overwhelming majority of persons here assembled have thier residence within a daffodil hued submersible vessel.
An underwater craft that's the colour of custard,
A U-Boat emitting electromagnetic radiation in the visible spectrum with a wavelength of 589 nanometres.

 

[wafflycat]

In the very near future, we will be arriving at the terminus.
So I will turn towards the last window decoration
And, my dear acquaintance, I shall state this in easily understandable terminology
I shall declare my baggage, that which I am surely aware of.

 

[TheDoctor]

Your present interlocutor is musing re an albino yuletide
Pretty much identical with those of my acquaintance in years gone by

 

[Chuffy]

Moor-escarpment. I, Catherine, have returned to your dwelling place. The ambient temperature here is less than agreeable. In the absence of a suitable door, please allow me to enter your house through a glazed aperture.
<twirly dance>

 

[TheDoctor]

The sum totality of our aural experience comprises
Wireless Ga Ga!!!

 

[Rhythm Thief]

If you knew Susie, like I know Susie
I'd kick your bloody teeth in.