My rich rich neighbour

[vernon]

One of my neighbours is a US resident for most of the year but he returns to his house that he inherited from his parents for short spells at Christmas, Easter and the summer.

Several weeks ago a short block of houses including his suffered from a power cut in the early hours of the morning which triggered all of the burglar alarms in the affected houses. After the restoration of power I let myself in to his house to reset the burglar alarm and was unable to do so.

I contacted him and then arranged for the alarm company to pay a visit to repair/reset the alarm. He was effusive with his thanks and promised a small thank you present.

He arrived back in the UK yesterday and left a card with a thank you present inside - £100 worth of Waitrose/John Lewis vouchers. The UN must have a very generous pension scheme.....he is a retired UN peace keeper.

Can't decide what to spend the vouchers on.

I was very effusive with my thanks by the way.

 

[Rohloff_Brompton_Rider]

charity?

 

[vernon]

charity?

It begins at home

Charities already do well out of Chateau Vernon funds.

 

[benb]

WMDs?

 

[vernon]

WMDs?

Mutton vindaloos?

Not many can survive the ensuing fallout.....

 

[Mad Doug Biker]

..... So bad even the trees turn red!

 

[vernon]

..... So bad even the trees turn red!

I can defoliate a complete forest after gorging on Bradford's finest curries.

 

[Mad Doug Biker]

I was just thinking about the red trees at Chernobyl

 

[slowmotion]

Vernon, do none of Waitrose's offerings meet your exacting " Pie Standard"? I suspect not.

 

[vernon]

Waitrose pies don't 'meat' my standards at all. They are gentrified quiches and flans with a crust on top.

 

[buddha]

Right now, I think the UN could do with a new pair of balls
You can get 210 British Pork & Sweet Chilli Sausages at Waitrose, and have 35p change. Very tasty!

 

[Mad Doug Biker]

Right now, I think the UN could do with a new pair of balls

Well, firstly they need a lot more people to go with them to Syria.

You can get 210 British Pork & Sweet Chilli Sausages at Waitrose, and have 35p change. Very tasty!

35p change from what though?

 

[Globalti]

Well why not reciprocate his generosity by buying some nice scran and inviting him round for a slap up dinner? Being an honorary Yank he will appreciate a good roast dinner with all the trimmings and a decent bottle of wine. You'll both enjoy it and will make friends for life.

There's nothing more valuable than good neighbours.

 

[Beebo]

Why dont you "accidently on purpose" set his alarm off a few more times, you could have built up a tidy sum by Christmas.

 

[TVC]

These pies aren't too bad, and you get a nice dish to use for your own creations in future:

http://www.waitrose.com/webapp/wcs/...e+pies+(2+per+pack)+(600g).html?storeId=10317

(I am aware that at this point Vernon could make me look like a pie pleb by giving a rubbish review of this product - but it's a risk I have to take).