Oh my, what have I just done?!

[Arch]

No, I'm near to Glasgow and they are in Leicester. Possibly worse than North Wales?

No really, I've been through Rhyl, and Leicester is better...

I hope you get a good result from it all. Worst case is they never get back to you, or get back and say "Sod off", either way you've not lost much. If you have any fears, keep them at arms length until sure.

I have a half family from my father's first marriage, who I know next to nothing about, only that they exist. We were only told as kids when it turned out that my half sister's husband was going to be on Mastermind. My Dad's sister had kept in touch with them, and let him know, and then he told us.

I've never been curious enough to track them down. I'm happy with the family I have, my friends, and NT.

 

[EltonFrog]

?...One of my friends suggested that I research my biological family via that website that is forever being advertised on TV but it costs money does that and I am not that curious.

I don't why but that last para made me laugh.

 

[Mad Doug Biker]

I payed on another site for a months access, so I have that amount of time to make it happen. If they don't reply then sod 'em. Actually I'd be rather deflated if that happened.

I'm now constantly checking my emails.

 

[Pat "5mph"]

( ..) it seems that none of us are safe from biologicals wanting to track us down.

 

[vernon]

(...)but it seems that none of us are safe from biologicals wanting to track us down

Thanks to the existence of social networking we are not safe from the unwanted attention of ex-girlfriends from thirty seven years ago either. I had to change my mobile phone number and email address twice to escape from a communication onslaught.

I should never have agreed to meet her. The meeting would have provided enough material to seed a script farcical TV drama episode and I can look back and laugh at the encounter now but it took some out of the box thinking to extricate myself from a sticky situation whilst preserving the dignity of us both.

My sister in law was contacted by an illegitimate daughter that she was forced to give up for adoption 50+ years ago. It caused all sorts of problems as her children born in wedlock were not aware of the presence of a step-sister. There were also potential security issues because at the time my brother in law was a serving commissioned officer based in Northern Ireland at the time and the initial communication was via the army who warned him that it could be a potential terrorist set up.

The initial meeting and several subsequent meetings were quite emotional and quite positive then the demands to become an integral part of the family unit and assumption of the mantle of 'senior offspring' started...

It ended in acrimony and tears.

 

[Mad Doug Biker]

Thanks for all of these.... err... encouraging posts everyone!

I have contacted them through a geneology site which they are already on, and it wouldn't be very difficult for them to have found out the existence of the first marriage of which I'm a grandson from.
Then again, I don't know how much they actually know about my Mum and her brother who died in infancy, but I am pretty sure that they are the right people as there are far too many coincidences if they aren't!

 

[Hotblack Desiato]

My rellies are almost certainly far richer than me so they are the ones who need to be afeard. Very Afeard.

 

[Mad Doug Biker]

I have just got a reply from one of them, hooray!! He sent me his family tree, but the site gives an option to hide certain entries, so I still haven't found out very much so far unless a lot of them are really all called 'Hidden'.

He did say that if I had any questions then I should ask, so I..... umm.... have just bombarded him with about 60 years worth of questions!

 

[Mad Doug Biker]

I don't know what you hope to achieve

Neither do I much yet, but just getting to know something about them would be nice if nothing else!

but you sound do much like my brother.

No I don't, because I know next to NOTHING them, I have never (knowingly) met any of them, I have never seen any pictures of them, I am not constantly trying to get back in touch with them, I just want to know who they are!

 

[summerdays]

Standard thing in putting family tree stuff online is not to show living relatives - I don't even put them online at all, even as hidden, as I haven't asked their permission to do so. I hate it when I have shared information only to find my name appear online and I can't do anything about it. He will probably share the hidden bits but not through the site.

 

[Mad Doug Biker]

Standard thing in putting family tree stuff online is not to show living relatives - I don't even put them online at all, even as hidden, as I haven't asked their permission to do so. I hate it when I have shared information only to find my name appear online and I can't do anything about it. He will probably share the hidden bits but not through the site.

Why? What do you think is going to happen? You need to ask permission to see the family tree, it isn't just open for anyone to see!

And anyway, the strange bit is though that some are shown and some are not, and it isn't living people either.

 

[summerdays]

Why? What do you think is going to happen? You need to ask permission to see the family tree, it isn't just open for anyone to see!

And anyway, the strange bit is though that some are shown and some are not, and it isn't living people either. He has given me a family tree going back to the 18th century, and even some of them are hidden, it all seems a bit random.

OK not so sure on that - perhaps they are bits he is unsure about. I've not really done the paying to access family tree stuff, preferring to put it online under my control - my impression of one of the big companies doing it, lets you upload for free and then they get others to pay them to see your information as far as I can see. I prefer open access so everyone can see the main part and then they can contact for more detailed stuff some people literally go around trying to collect as many names as possible - maybe he doesn't want to give you all the information in one go?

 

[Mad Doug Biker]

This is one where, yes, you need to pay, but you still need to ask the 'tree owner' for access.

Personally I think I should have picked a better site, but hey ho.

 

[Mad Doug Biker]

Anyway, in an attempt to introduce myself, I sent him a picture of me in my Cycle Chat jersey, so if that doesn't scare him off then I should be ok!


I just hope they aren't a bunch of bike hating petrolheads!

 

[summerdays]

This is one where, yes, you need to pay, but you still need to ask the 'tree owner' for access.

Personally I think I should have picked a better site, but hey ho.

The most important thing on the site would be that you had connections already on it - so it would seem to have been successful.