Olympic Sports for 'oldies'

[Noodley]

Okay, I fancy applying for some lottery funding

What sport would an 'oldie' like me be able to win a medal?

Curling springs to mind, as does shooting.

Any others? I need help with my plan to win gold....

 

[Tim Bennet.]

Forget shooting! They haven't got any Olympic Funding to spend on you.

They had millions handed out to them over the last two Olympic cycles and lavished it on themselves to allow their 'athletes' to become full time professionals and work unfettered by financial worries under their 'performance director'. Unfortunately as a result of all this, their medal winning ability at the Olympics actually got worse, so as one of the three failing sports in this country, their funding has been withdrawn.

Interesting, the decision was made by Peter Keane in his current role with Sport England (Sport UK?).

 

[rich p]

You and MacB could enter the World Curmudgeon doubles competition with NickM as first reserve

 

[snorri]

Okay, I fancy applying for some lottery funding

What sport would an 'oldie' like me be able to win a medal?

Sweeping snow off paths for pensioners.

 

[Noodley]

I'm glad shooting is not funded as I doubt I could hit a cow's arse with a banjo.

So, looks like I'll have to buy some slacks, a polo neck, a polo shirt and a piece of sponge to put over my shoes. I already have a brush - I'm sure the kitchen floor won't mind not getting swept as often.

Curling it is.

Can I therefore make a direct appeal to all good CCers - rather than me wasting good training time filling in complicated forms to submit for Lottery funding can you all send me a few quid each week, and encourage friends, family, neighbours, strangers, colleagues, (anyone really) to do likewise. I'll make good use of it - I'll buy the clothes first and post pics of the ensemble.

After that I'll get some tins of paint to draw the circles in the ice. I reckon by 2020 I could have a the gear sorted

 

[rich p]

My mum used to be good at curling but she had a perm eventually

 

[snorri]

Curling it is.
After that I'll get some tins of paint to draw the circles in the ice. I reckon by 2020 I could have a the gear sorted

Wouldn't want to discourage you, but I fear the Arctic icecap will have receded to somewhere far north of Noodleyland by 2020.

 

[Aperitif]

Will you be using video analysis Noodley - or just relying on a slide show or two?
My donation teeters on the rim of doubt.

 

[Noodley]

Wouldn't want to discourage you, but I fear the Arctic icecap will have receded to somewhere far north of Noodleyland by 2020.

All the more reason for you to send me money so I can afford a purpose-built ice rink.

I'll accept Postal Orders.

Anyone know where the 2020 Winter Games are?

 

[Noodley]

Will you be using video analysis Noodley - or just relying on a slide show or two?
My donation teeters on the rim of doubt.

I'll be needng all the money you can afford - I'll be leaving no stone unturned in my quest for glory!

Anyone sending donations will rink highly in my estimation.

 

[Noodley]

Anyone know where the 2020 Winter Games are?

Okay, so there's no Games in 2020.

You'll have to send me money soon as I'll have to up my purchasing/training regime in time for 2018....

 

[Aperitif]

I'm sucked into the 'lingua curla' now, with the "Wicky whacky woo" and, appealingly, "Stacking the Brooms"

 

[rich p]

I'm sucked into the 'lingua curla' now, with the "Wicky whacky woo" and, appealingly, "Stacking the Brooms"

Hoots mon, there's a stoon aboot the hoos.

 

[surfgurl]

I'm not sure if waiting for 2018 is a good idea. I read somewhere that the quarry where all the curling stones come from only has enough stone to last until 2016.

 

[Noodley]

I'm not sure if waiting for 2018 is a good idea. I read somewhere that the quarry where all the curling stones come from only has enough stone to last until 2016.

Okay, immediate money wil be required to buy some granite and have someone fashion a few stanes.

I'll enlist snorri's help, he can chip away at some granite with his multi-tool...