Well done to the dozen or so cyclists who felt it imperative that they push past me and the other cyclists waiting to go through Admiralty Arch and to shove themselves through the minute gap between the white van and the Arch itself. What a pity that, even for those fakengers amongst you with the silly narrow bars, the space was too tight to traverse easily. We appreciate that your vital journeys (for we are sure that you must all be surgeons rushing to carry out emergency surgery or spies hurrying to save us from a terrorist mastermind about to unleash Armageddon) mean that you couldn’t be delayed for the 15 seconds or so that it took for the lights to change and the van to move forward. We understand that your journey is so important that you just had to push past the van, and in so doing leave it with scratches and dents on its side - your banging on the side of the van was surely just an understandable sign of your importance. A special mention must go to the two riders who were thoughtful enough to regale the van driver with their considered and erudite views of his road positioning. We are sure that it is only an oversight on your part to not notice that he couldn’t move over as there was another wide vehicle to his right. Well done for portraying cyclists as such considerate road users - we are certain that the driver will feel suitably chastised and cowed for daring to be on the road when you wished to travel. Good on you for displaying such bravado in the face of such adversity, for the driver didn't even dare to comment upon your actions, and for letting the ‘cagers’ know that we cyclists are the only ones who should have access to the highways and byways of this green and pleasant land. We are sure that your contribution to understanding between road users will be valued by all your fellow cyclists!