The Snooty Brigade
- Thread starter XmisterIS
- Start date
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wafflycat
New Member
- Location
- middle of Norfolk
I prepare myself suitably for when cycling, dependent upon steed.
If I plan to cycle on the tourer, I stop taking the hormone meds to enable my beard to grow, I don socks, sandals and take knitting needles & cereals in order to knit my own museli at tea stops.
If I plan on cycling sur road bike, I have a bit of plastic surgery done to enhance the facial sneer I aim towards anyone on a mountain bike or hybrid.
If I'm on the recumbent, I overdo the caffeine before hand (a full packet of esspresso usually does the trick) to make sure I am high as a kite in order to complete the suitably mad, maniacal look of the cycling oddball, cackling laughter as I cycle along.
When I'm planning to go out on the hybrid, I make sure I've watched lots of depressing films beforehand, so I can develop the full sense of sadness & neediness required to wave in feeble gestures at everyone else out on the bike and then burst into tears when the roadies don't wave back...
If I plan to cycle on the tourer, I stop taking the hormone meds to enable my beard to grow, I don socks, sandals and take knitting needles & cereals in order to knit my own museli at tea stops.
If I plan on cycling sur road bike, I have a bit of plastic surgery done to enhance the facial sneer I aim towards anyone on a mountain bike or hybrid.
If I'm on the recumbent, I overdo the caffeine before hand (a full packet of esspresso usually does the trick) to make sure I am high as a kite in order to complete the suitably mad, maniacal look of the cycling oddball, cackling laughter as I cycle along.
When I'm planning to go out on the hybrid, I make sure I've watched lots of depressing films beforehand, so I can develop the full sense of sadness & neediness required to wave in feeble gestures at everyone else out on the bike and then burst into tears when the roadies don't wave back...
Archie_tect
De Skieven Architek... aka Penfold + Horace
- Location
- Northumberland
Wow! Excellent analysis wafflycat, makes everybody sound sad and pointless but hey we all ride bikes so who cares anyway!
...by omission, you clearly have a sneaking admiration for MTBers because of their cool, but youthful joie de vivre?
...by omission, you clearly have a sneaking admiration for MTBers because of their cool, but youthful joie de vivre?
wafflycat
New Member
- Location
- middle of Norfolk
Archie_tect said:Wow! Excellent analysis wafflycat, makes everybody sound sad and pointless but hey we all ride bikes so who cares anyway!
...by omission, you clearly have a sneaking admiration for MTBers because of their cool, but youthful joie de vivre?
That'll be a no.
I am, of course, sat here in full Assos roadie kit as I type.
purplepolly
New Member
- Location
- my house
Archie_tect said:Wow! Excellent analysis wafflycat, makes everybody sound sad and pointless but hey we all ride bikes so who cares anyway!
I'm still trying to work out where folding bikes fit in.
wafflycat
New Member
- Location
- middle of Norfolk
purplepolly said:
The boot of the car, obviously!
aJohnson
Senior Member
- Location
- Bury, Manchester
I had one old woman hiss at me today, she wasn't riding but I still found it weird. Then I got the "evil eye" from some guy who was smoking on a mountain bike on the pavement.
OP
OP
XmisterIS
Purveyor of fine nonsense
wafflycat said:I prepare myself suitably for when cycling, dependent upon steed.
If I plan to cycle on the tourer, I stop taking the hormone meds to enable my beard to grow, I don socks, sandals and take knitting needles & cereals in order to knit my own museli at tea stops.
If I plan on cycling sur road bike, I have a bit of plastic surgery done to enhance the facial sneer I aim towards anyone on a mountain bike or hybrid.
If I'm on the recumbent, I overdo the caffeine before hand (a full packet of esspresso usually does the trick) to make sure I am high as a kite in order to complete the suitably mad, maniacal look of the cycling oddball, cackling laughter as I cycle along.
When I'm planning to go out on the hybrid, I make sure I've watched lots of depressing films beforehand, so I can develop the full sense of sadness & neediness required to wave in feeble gestures at everyone else out on the bike and then burst into tears when the roadies don't wave back...
What about when you're on the unicycle? Or even the tricycle?? Good God man, contigency!
wafflycat
New Member
- Location
- middle of Norfolk
Man?? Man???
Not with chesticles the size of the ones I own!
Not with chesticles the size of the ones I own!
OP
OP
XmisterIS
Purveyor of fine nonsense
Lol! I didn't look at the profile ... 
But now I have ... "woman" ... "lycra" ...
But now I have ... "woman" ... "lycra" ...
wafflycat
New Member
- Location
- middle of Norfolk
Teehee!
C
chillyuk
Guest
I'm sure we all have our own snooty brigade in our area. We certainly have around here (harlow, Essex). However, the other day I had an irrepairable puncture in my tube that left me stranded 10 miles from home.
I arranged for someone to come and pick me up, and whilst waiting I left the bike upside down as there was nowhere to lean it. Just about every cyclist who came past, including the roadies, slowed down or stopped just to check I was OK.
it restored my faith in human kindness!!
I arranged for someone to come and pick me up, and whilst waiting I left the bike upside down as there was nowhere to lean it. Just about every cyclist who came past, including the roadies, slowed down or stopped just to check I was OK.
it restored my faith in human kindness!!
OP
OP
XmisterIS
Purveyor of fine nonsense
Bongman said:You asked for this one:
Your post is nothing without pictures!
Preferably in or out of the lycra ...
