all of which puts me in mind of Cary Grant's muffins (courtesy IMDb)
He once phoned hotel mogul Conrad Hilton in Istanbul, Turkey, to find out why his breakfast order at the Plaza Hotel, which called for muffins, came with only one and a half English muffins instead of two. When Grant insisted that the explanation (a hotel efficiency report had found that most people ate only three of the four halves brought to them) still resulted in being cheated out of a half, the Plaza Hotel changed its policy and began serving two complete muffins with breakfast. From then on, Grant often spoke of forming an English Muffin-Lovers Society, members of which would be required to report any hotel or restaurant that listed muffins on the menu and then served fewer than two
