Things you'd like to say, but can't
- Thread starter Stig-OT-Dump
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Lullabelle
Banana
Night Train
Maker of Things
Half sister:
We don't hear from you, no visits, no letters, no cards, no calls, nothing. When you used to call, decades ago, you'd slate my mum, my brother, and me for no reason other then spite. You have never made any moves to improve our relationship at all, only to hurt our feelings and disrespect our family.
However, now you have called a few times to ask our Dad for money. Why? Because you haven't worked a day in your lazy arse life and have lived off your husbands earnings, and now that he has been ill for a long time and his pension is running out you phone and ask for money, nothing else, just money. We have told you before that we have no money, we are poor, our dad and my mum only have a small state pension and I have been out of work ill for over two years.
But now your brother tells you that I have a large house so you phone again pleading that because even our kitchen is bigger then your Hong Kong apartment we must send you money.
Bollocks to you. If I have to send you anything, because you think I am rich with my big house, then I will send you a few spare bricks and leave off the postage.
My big house is worth less then your apartment in Hong Kong but I still worked my arse off to afford it.
Go get a job, or a cheaper home, and stop calling us asking for money. Also be grateful it was not me who answered the phone this morning!
We don't hear from you, no visits, no letters, no cards, no calls, nothing. When you used to call, decades ago, you'd slate my mum, my brother, and me for no reason other then spite. You have never made any moves to improve our relationship at all, only to hurt our feelings and disrespect our family.
However, now you have called a few times to ask our Dad for money. Why? Because you haven't worked a day in your lazy arse life and have lived off your husbands earnings, and now that he has been ill for a long time and his pension is running out you phone and ask for money, nothing else, just money. We have told you before that we have no money, we are poor, our dad and my mum only have a small state pension and I have been out of work ill for over two years.
But now your brother tells you that I have a large house so you phone again pleading that because even our kitchen is bigger then your Hong Kong apartment we must send you money.
Bollocks to you. If I have to send you anything, because you think I am rich with my big house, then I will send you a few spare bricks and leave off the postage.
My big house is worth less then your apartment in Hong Kong but I still worked my arse off to afford it.
Go get a job, or a cheaper home, and stop calling us asking for money. Also be grateful it was not me who answered the phone this morning!
fimm
Veteran
This is the only flight of steps down to this platform. Therefore, if I politely suggest that you move your assorted children and suitcases that are scattered around the bottom of it, I do not expect to be laughed at, you pillockhead. Why don't you switch your brain on and consider that it is possible that other people might want to get suitcases, bicycles, or just themselves onto the platform.
Dear colleague,
You are exceeding the safe working load for those leggings and if they were to give way the rest of the office may to be trapped/injured under the human equivalent of a land slide.
It is your right to be enormous but please stop dressing like you have Kate Moss's dimensions.
And change your bloody bedroom mirror, the last one obviously came from a funfair if you looked in it this morning and thought you looked ok.
Thank you
You are exceeding the safe working load for those leggings and if they were to give way the rest of the office may to be trapped/injured under the human equivalent of a land slide.
It is your right to be enormous but please stop dressing like you have Kate Moss's dimensions.
And change your bloody bedroom mirror, the last one obviously came from a funfair if you looked in it this morning and thought you looked ok.
Thank you
hopless500
Trundling along
hopless500
Trundling along
Think I need a new mirror 
simon.r
Person
Something I did actually say:
I'd ordered an item online from Halfords and went to pick it up. There was no one at the tills so I went to the parts desk, where a 17 year old youth was tapping away at the computer -
Him - tap, tap on the computer, totally ignoring the fact that I was stood directly in front of him.
Him - continues to tap. Another customer comes and stands next to me.
Him - after about 2 minutes, stops tapping, looks at me and says "Hi buddy"
Me - "Firstly, I am not your buddy and secondly I object to being ignored. Now, please can I collect order number 1234?"
I was quite pleased with myself
The other customer said "well said" to me when the assistant went off to get the item I'd ordered!
I'd ordered an item online from Halfords and went to pick it up. There was no one at the tills so I went to the parts desk, where a 17 year old youth was tapping away at the computer -
Him - tap, tap on the computer, totally ignoring the fact that I was stood directly in front of him.
Him - continues to tap. Another customer comes and stands next to me.
Him - after about 2 minutes, stops tapping, looks at me and says "Hi buddy"
Me - "Firstly, I am not your buddy and secondly I object to being ignored. Now, please can I collect order number 1234?"
I was quite pleased with myself
The other customer said "well said" to me when the assistant went off to get the item I'd ordered!
Puddles
Do I need to get the spray plaster out?
Thank you dear bum hole for returning my son to me with no homework done, I thought my email that included the email from the school was quite clear as to what NEEDED to be done cheers for not doing any of it meaning I now need to squeeze 8 days of every day homework from the school in to 2 days on top of the work he has for the next 2 days because you are aware he is then on holiday with his grandparents and it is not fair to make him do extra then, and when he gets back he only has a couple of days and then he is away with your parents and I am telling you now they best play fur king ball
It would have taken you 1/2 an hour a day tops, you could not even be bothered to listen to him read for 5 minutes every day you are a poor pathetic excuse for a father and your wonderfully written (by your gf) entries as to what he got up to every day with "Daddy" that he needs to copy into his summer journal fooled no one did you not realise at 7 he would be able to read it and say to me we didn't do any of that
So thanks I have to share him all round which I do and I get him for a whole 7 days out of 44 in the summer hols so he gets to spend time with everyone and I am the one who ends up being the big bad 'kin troll biatch mother from hell as I am the one that insists he does the homework set by the school which will assist him a lot and give up time we could also be doing "fun" things together by helping him catch up with all the bits he should have done and didnt whilst he was with you... oh cough cough silly me not with you as you didnt even take the time off work while he spent that time with your new gf and her son.
The only thing that is positive out of this is I now have a record, you twat, of how you did not do your bit as a parent AGAIN! Stop trying to be his mate grow up and realise parenting is not all unicorns and 'kin rainbows.
You do realise that he didn't pop out of me that way the reason he is polite and well behaved is me and hard bloody work, the only reason people tell you that you are "Lucky to have such a polite nice little boy" is because I put the damn hours in to make sure he is like that, telling him he does not need to do his homework because he is not in senior school yet is just ridiculous!
Your are a dick and the only reason I do not tell you this directly is because it is the wrong time of the month and I am so livid right now for how you have wronged your son I could strangle you.
I am Mother hear me roar - how dare you
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrghhhhhhhhhh!
It would have taken you 1/2 an hour a day tops, you could not even be bothered to listen to him read for 5 minutes every day you are a poor pathetic excuse for a father and your wonderfully written (by your gf) entries as to what he got up to every day with "Daddy" that he needs to copy into his summer journal fooled no one did you not realise at 7 he would be able to read it and say to me we didn't do any of that
So thanks I have to share him all round which I do and I get him for a whole 7 days out of 44 in the summer hols so he gets to spend time with everyone and I am the one who ends up being the big bad 'kin troll biatch mother from hell as I am the one that insists he does the homework set by the school which will assist him a lot and give up time we could also be doing "fun" things together by helping him catch up with all the bits he should have done and didnt whilst he was with you... oh cough cough silly me not with you as you didnt even take the time off work while he spent that time with your new gf and her son.
The only thing that is positive out of this is I now have a record, you twat, of how you did not do your bit as a parent AGAIN! Stop trying to be his mate grow up and realise parenting is not all unicorns and 'kin rainbows.
You do realise that he didn't pop out of me that way the reason he is polite and well behaved is me and hard bloody work, the only reason people tell you that you are "Lucky to have such a polite nice little boy" is because I put the damn hours in to make sure he is like that, telling him he does not need to do his homework because he is not in senior school yet is just ridiculous!
Your are a dick and the only reason I do not tell you this directly is because it is the wrong time of the month and I am so livid right now for how you have wronged your son I could strangle you.
I am Mother hear me roar - how dare you
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrghhhhhhhhhh!
Lullabelle
Banana
Why are you so excited about going to Disney Land? You are 44 years old ffs,
Lullabelle
Banana
When he is older he will thank you for being there and being the 1 stable influence on his life
