Under toilet doors.......

[bobg]

Flushed with success at my thesis on cleavage, I was reminded of another incident and this time I have to admit it was me.

Allow me to set the scene. First week of promotion out of uniform to an HQ management position and feeling very out of place at a desk after 15 years climbing about on ships. A very anxious young man of about 25 approached me and asked if he could speak to me in private. He told me that he had been sitting in trap one with his trousers round his ankles reading the paper and having a fag ( things were different in those days) when a face appeared under the door.
He recognised it as a middle aged chap working on the next team , and as I was his line manager he was reporting it to me to take whatever action I thought was necessary

FWIW, I had an informal chat with my ( more experienced) boss. He suggested that we ensured that such action was possible and so we sauntered into the bog, I sat on the recently vacated seat ( trousers firmly belted ) and he got down on his hands and knees to see if the peepee ( for want of a better phrase ) could have performed the feat.......... I kid you not.....

I subsequently then interviewed the accused, he admitted it and said that it was a compulsion which he was unable to control and promised to reserve his hobby for outside office hours.

I regale you with this little anecdote because over my working lifetime I found myself in many surreal situations
- lady team member who wet her knickers and kept the soiled ones in the drawer of her desk
- arranged a Christmas party at which wives were invited only to find ( too late) that some prankster had booked surprise strippers

et al.

and idly wondered if I was just unlucky or are we all similarly blessed ...??

 

[ufkacbln]

I once had a woman contact me (as Duty Admin Officer) to say that her husband (Army Corporal) had gone out with mates on Friday night for a drinking session and had not come back (this was Sunday)..... when I checked the records he had been posted to Hong Kong, and flown out as scheduled.

However he had not told his wife!

Big welfare job as he had effectively used his posting to walkout on wife and two kids!

 

[Krypton]

We used to have a guy do some part-time truck driving. Big bloke, with a big appetite, who could eat everyone in the firm under the table.

We got a call one afternoon from a garage we'd collected cars from for years - "please tell your driver he is banned from using our toilets ever again." Turns out that he'd blocked the loo with his number two and they'd had to call in a company to get it unblocked.

Thankfully it wasn't me who had to sit him down in the office and explain it to him.

 

[Globalti]

Ha ha! We used to have a piano tuner who used to come once a year and every time he used to go and have a huge smelly dump in our bog.

Regarding the OP, surely the peeping Tom is a peeper and the victim is the peepee?

If you want some bowel stories try having a Dad who had a colostomy (rectum removed and a bag on the abdomen) and suffered from Alzheimer's. Then add diarrhoea. Gawd!

 

[ArDee]

I once had a woman contact me (as Duty Admin Officer) to say that her husband (Army Corporal) had gone out with mates on Friday night for a drinking session and had not come back (this was Sunday)..... when I checked the records he had been posted to Hong Kong, and flown out as scheduled.

However he had not told his wife!

Big welfare job as he had effectively used his posting to walkout on wife and two kids!

Similar story, the wife of one of the guys I had working for me phoned me on a Tuesday to say she understood that he was going to be away on business for the previous week; but as it was Tuesday of the following week and he'd not come home or phoned could we confirm he was all right and when the job would be finished?

I had to tell her, with the help of H.R. that as far as we were concerned he was on 2 weeks holiday.

Turned out he'd booked two weeks off to go on holiday with girl friend to Spain and move in with her after the holiday, but, told his wife that he was away on business for a week. It was the way he'd arranged for her to find out that he'd left her and wasn't coming home.

 

[PaulB]

My brother-in-law (some of you may have met him on our ride earlier this year) had to leave employment at Rolls Royce where he worked after some serious 'pranks' culminated in this one; he was in a toilet cubicle when someone pushed a newspaper which had been set on fire under the partition at which a guy standing on the ceramic bowl of the adjacent toilet yelled out the word 'fire' and threw a full bucket of freezing water over the top of the partition to 'extinguish' the fire.

 

[stowie]

At a friend's place of employment, one of his colleagues took 2 weeks holiday.

His supervisor went to visit one of her customers, and saw him in the office working there.

He had accepted a job at the customer's company, but hadn't resigned from his old job. He said he was working 2 weeks at the new place to see if he liked it before making a decision.

Needless to say he didn't need to make a decision in the end as both companies sacked him. Apparently he couldn't see the issue...