What do you think of casts of dead people for children?

[Puddles]

Interesting input

I don't think I am removed from the reality of death, I agree a person just disappearing and no explanation given to a child is wrong, children accept truth quite readily and are very open creatures.

I do not think having a cast made of the dead persons hand for the child to hold is really the way to go either, go and hold a persons hand, feel the warmth the tiny pressures that are on yours and the feelings you can convey with someone you love/care about without saying a word, now think about a cold hard metal hand and holding that with the emotional maturity & understanding of a just turned 3 year old being told this is Nannys hand for you to hold?

I fail to see where that could be considered a comfort, an article of clothing that smells of her, a squirt of her perfume on a pillow I can understand there is a connection to the person there is an associated rush of feelings in connection with the smell, same with a photo or some video.

When I say I don't do the dead body peering thing, it is because I have no need to see a life less corpse. I don't feel the need to add that memory to mine of the person I knew to me it is just a body the person that I knew is not there

I also may be odd in the aspect that I think a life should be celebrated, I don't do grave visiting, I will, however, have a conversation with someone who has died, to explain....

On death I was raised being told stars are dead people, your loved ones do not go far, just as far as the stars to watch over you and wait for you, and although you cannot see them in the day they are there, and it does not matter where you are in the world if you miss them, you can always look up to the sky on a clear night and see them there - some people will considered that weird but it has been a comfort.

I have no hesitation in talking to dead people, I don't do going to graves as personally I do not feel the person is there, I will quite happily chat away to them whilst in the kitchen or walking the dog you know normal everyday settings. When my Maternal Grandfather (he was very ill & in lots of pain) died some 20 odd years ago I can remember my Mum saying to me you are crying for yourself not for him, because if you could wish him back in the pain he was in you did not love him at all.

I was around 3 when my Paternal Grandfather died, I don't remember him at all, there are pictures of me with him but I have no memory of him but that is the nature of the beast small people simply do not retain memories as a matter of course at that age.

I am not judging them for the hand cast, more saying "I" find it creepy and weird & it is not something I would personally do as I do not understand what it is meant to achieve as a comfort. In short as I said I don't "get it"

I also fully accept I have no need to "get it" but I do try to understand things and this I simply do not understand how this would be a comfort.

 

[Cheddar George]

He's only a 3 year old boy, i don't think he will understand the weirdness. By the time he's 8 he will be chasing his mates down the road with granny's dead hand.

 

[Sandra6]

He's only a 3 year old boy, i don't think he will understand the weirdness. By the time he's 8 he will be chasing his mates down the road with granny's dead hand.

Or he could be a teenager inviting girls up to his room to shake his granny's hand.

 

[Saluki]

You know Puddles, I don't understand how this would be a comfort.
Death is a natural part of life but making casts of bits for kids does seem a little weird I think. Is the child going to understand that Granny has gone and that he is holding a cast of her hand? It may well freak him out a bit.

Like you, I don't go to the viewings, only the funerals ever since my Mum forced me to kiss my very dead grandfather goodbye when I was about 4. Most funerals I have been too have been celebrations of the person's life, not very sombre at all. Dare I say they were fun? Because they were.

Condolences on the loss of your Cousin.

 

[Night Train]

I have a phobia of dead things so this really wouldn't appeal to me.

I think if something like that had to be made then I would prefer it to be a sculpture made by an artist who is able to capture the 'living image' and 'essence' of the person in life, then postmortem.

 

[Canrider]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Post-mortem_photography
Probably not for the squeamish, and the wiki images are fairly tame compared to some via the links at the bottom.

Other times, other places, other customs.

 

[Mad Doug Biker]

. Is the child going to understand that Granny has gone and that he is holding a cast of her hand? It may well freak him out a bit.

He's only a 3 year old boy, i don't think he will understand the weirdness. By the time he's 8 he will be chasing his mates down the road with granny's dead hand.

Exactly! That's it, he'll get over it quickly and move on, the hand will just be a little curiosity to be looked at every so often. I think that some might be thinking into this a bit too deeply. That said, none of us know the kid, so we don't know his nature.

As for the cast being a comfort, well, it might be a bit out there, I admit, but someone obviously thinks the boy will appreciate it, even though it'll probably only be for a short period of time before he moves on to something else (he's 3 after all).

I have a phobia of dead things so this really wouldn't appeal to me.

I have casts of my feet somewhere from the Podiatrist. I want people to remember me by them when I'm gone! Seriously though, a bit like my feet, the hand isn't even dead, its just a cast, a model as it were. If, however you are wanting to attribute life to innanimate objects, then you should have a phobia about all the dead and lifeless bits of machinery and so on out there too.

 

[Puddles]

the hand isn't even dead, its just a cast, a model as it were. .

Exactly an as an adult you can understand that. but how do you start with giving that to a just 3 year old (he is 2 months old than mine) that this is a cast of Nannys hand for you to hold, because I would assume (maybe incorrectly) that if you are going to the trouble & expense of having a cast made from her actual hand and then make it into a metal hand, you are going to tell said 3 y/o what it is.

If I had to name one concern my main one would be his lack of understanding as to what it is & the distinct possibility he will think they have actually cut Nannys hand off, small people are very literal beings.

 

[vernon]

I think we have become over sensitized to death and its accompanying activities. I was brought up in an era where it was common place for the deceased to be placed in the parlour/living room of the house while life carried on. A lot of the stuff now done by undertakers used to be done by members of the community specializing to laying out bodies. In my community there were two women - one Catholic and one Church of England who dealt with it. There was not the squeemishness surrounding death and l there certainly no mystery about the post mortem rituals. My maternal relatives had conventional funerals whereas my parents had West Indian funerals and boy how I wish I had more Jamaican relatives close to dying age in the UK. There's a two to three day wake with the bodies on display, every body sees the product of death, gets drunk and has a whale of a time. No-one would bat an eyelid at a casting.

 

[swee'pea99]

That's almost as bad as having your pet stuffed...

(I know, any excuse...I have no shame)

 

[Beebo]

Anyone been to see Lenin?
I was in Red Square in 2005, but didnt have time to queue up for a peek!

 

[Mad Doug Biker]

If I had to name one concern my main one would be his lack of understanding as to what it is & the distinct possibility he will think they have actually cut Nannys hand off, small people are very literal beings.

Surely once its explained to him he'll understand. Also, if its to be metal, then they could just tell the kid that its an ornament of Gran's hand... and no it isn't real, its just what she wanted so that he wouldn't forget her and their all too brief time together.

 

[rich p]

Ooh yes, I remember that one. What about the Fiend Without a Face? We lived near an airport, and of course every time a jet went overhead I remember expecting to hear that sithering crunching sound they made as they approached......

Maybe this would be more appropriate...

 

[Saluki]

Anyone been to see Lenin?
I was in Red Square in 2005, but didnt have time to queue up for a peek!

Not seen Lenin but have seen Jeremy Bentham, I know its not the same but the travelling is less.

 

[slowmotion]

I saw a Pope or two in glass cases in churches in Italy. You had to stuff a few lira into a coin-op gadget to turn the lights on for a minute or so. A lovely touch by the Roman Catholic church.
Maybe Vernon's right, let it all hang out....Dr. Gunther von Hagens style. Google that name if you want. I think that he embraces Death a bit too closely.