What is your relationship like?

[numbnuts]

20 years after divorce mines fine

 

[Keith Oates]

Together 16 years, married 12 of that.

I was once told that a good relationship starts with lust, becomes love then develops tolerance. I think that's about right, we love each other, we get on, we don't (often) get wound up by each other's imperfections, but then again I'm not Tiger Woods.

You mean you play golf together and she complains when you hit a bad shot!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[Arch]

I'll bear that in mind, Hobbes, cheers!

It doesn't help that I'm not into the sort of social situations where you traditionally meet people (clubs, pubs etc, except when out with people I already know), plus at my age, the best ones are taken. I suppose in a few years, there'll be eligible divorcees....

 

[jeltz]

[/COLOR]

You mean you play golf together and she complains when you hit a bad shot!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

No I mean I only play the hole's I'm supposed to.

 

[summerdays]

Generally normal sane, up and down and know that we are there for each other. We each have our habits that annoy the other (mine is being untidy and disorganised, his is being a shy antisocial soul), and that's usually the reason of any grumpy bits. But generally you accept the person for what they are - and then a smile from them across a room can light up your day!

 

[ASC1951]

plus at my age, the best ones are taken.

Are they, though? The logic of that is that you are one of the worst ones; which I'm sure you don't believe, nor should you.

There are single people available at every age; but once you are past the 'at it like rabbits' years, there isn't the same imperative to compromise your values, interests and friendships just for the sake of being 'in a relationship'.

 

[Arch]

Are they, though? The logic of that is that you are one of the worst ones; which I'm sure you don't believe, nor should you.

There are single people available at every age; but once you are past the 'at it like rabbits' years, there isn't the same imperative to compromise your values, interests and friendships just for the sake of being 'in a relationship'.

Well, whatever the reason, all the nice blokes I meet are taken, or show no signs of being interested in being taken....

 

[BigonaBianchi]

Well, whatever the reason, all the nice blokes I meet are taken, or show no signs of being interested in being taken....

get your coat you've pulled

 

[Tim Bennet.]

The logic of that is that you are one of the worst ones; which I'm sure you don't believe, nor should you.

Arch, in the parallel universe inhabited by ASC1951, he considers that turn of phrase to constitute 'coming on strong'.

You have a suitor.
With a bike.

I'll think I'll go and buy a new hat.

 

[GrahamNR17]

Me and mine have known each other since school and get on brilliantly, after all these years

She lives near Brisbane, I live near Norwich

Communication seems to be key. Only yesterday I sent her a fax in reply to her email about my answerphone message about her letter

 

[Norm]

...plus at my age, the best ones are taken...

...or show no signs of being interested in being taken....

There's a great quote about this which I can't remember exactly but it's along the lines of "The trouble with looking for boyfriends is that the best ones already have boyfriends of their own."

Some days we're together but pretty much silent as we seem to have nothing to say...

Apparently, I've been married 20 years now, which I don't understand as I'm only 32 years old.

However, I would say that those quiet moments can be the best ones. Not because my wife can talk for her country but because there's times when you don't need to talk to be comfortable in someone else's company. Silence can be nice, calm, peaceful, relax into it don't stress about it "meaning" something because it usually doesn't.

IMO.

 

[jonny jeez]

If I had a bigger flat, I'd just get a cat.

Nooooo...avoid the cat...single women with cats..it's like saying your done with relationships altogether.

It doesn't help that I'm not into the sort of social situations where you traditionally meet people (clubs, pubs etc, except when out with people I already know), ....

Good job to, I always feel they are some of the worst places to meet people. Clubs and pubs are generally full of people trying to either impress, pull, escape or just get drunk and fall down. Unlikley you'll meet someone there who just wants to share some of their life with someone of a similar mind. If you ever want to find a relationship, I would say stick to the places you DO like to go, dont go to places that are just not "YOU"

There are single people available at every age; but once you are past the 'at it like rabbits' years, there isn't the same imperative to compromise your values, interests and friendships just for the sake of being 'in a relationship'.

well said

 

[jonny jeez]

It's a shame you're not in London as I'm organising evenings out for my female single friends who want to give themselves a fighting chance at meeting someone (or at least get an ego boost of being chatted up for an evening). But if you do happen to be in London any Friday evening in 2010 you'd be very welcome to come along to anything that's been organised, so feel free to let me know. It's not a clique group either!

What a great idea...

I know a couple of decent single 30 something chaps that might be happy to do some chatting up


This an another relationship related thread have really got me thinking.

Man its tough out there!

 

[jonny jeez]

If this has been done before.. sorry I was just wondering what other people's relationships are generally like (with your other half). Mine is coming up to a year long, and somedays is absolutely amazing, warm and fun. Other days (much less often!) we just irritate each other, unwittingly- I think!. Some days we're together but pretty much silent as we seem to have nothing to say, then others we talk about everything and nothing non-stop for hours. Is that what it's generally like, or are other people's on a more even keel, or is it to do with the length of time of the relationship?

Yup, that's pretty much it.

I've been with Mrs Jeez for nearly a quarter of a century (we met when we were 15 years old and are still only young-uns) and that is pretty much the summary of our life.

dont expect too much more, that stuff is for hollywood, the real stuff is what you described...what is it that John Lennon said..."life is what happens while you're making plans"

 

[Christopher]

If this has been done before.. sorry I was just wondering what other people's relationships are generally like (with your other half). Mine is coming up to a year long, and somedays is absolutely amazing, warm and fun. Other days (much less often!) we just irritate each other, unwittingly- I think!. Some days we're together but pretty much silent as we seem to have nothing to say, then others we talk about everything and nothing non-stop for hours. Is that what it's generally like, or are other people's on a more even keel, or is it to do with the length of time of the relationship?

Sounds exactly like my relationship & we've been together, off and on, since 1996 and knew each other, through a caving club, since 1992. There have been a few serious bust-ups but we have always got back together. Having a lot of things in common certainly helps.
BTW you doing something as stressful as a PhD can't have helped as you won't have the time or energy to commit 100% to the relationship. Hopefully things'll get better once the viva is out of the way.

& hang in there Arch! We're all rooting for you