What was your dad's worst car?

[Yellow Fang]

The Allegro Estate and the Maestro turned my stomach! Filthy cars. Anyone remember the Maestro talking? How to make a car both ugly and annoying.

There was an amusing cartoon that read, "I love my Maestro. It told my mother-in-law to f*** off."

 

[PBancroft]

One of these, and in this colour too. Actually its a pretty nice car and a decent one is a dream to drive... but his one was a rust bucket and a pig to look after. Eventually it became my sister's first car... only because he didn't really care if she knackered it!

 

[slowmotion]

^^^^^^^That roll bar is so wrong.

 

[Piemaster]

I had an Allegro Estate. It was an excellent car- loads of room and a ride/handling mix streets ahead of the equivalents from Ford or Vauxhall. Only the top of the range Maestros/Montegos talked but most people disabled the feature.

My Dad had one for a bit too, then he gave me (when he bought a sierra) it and I ran it for best part of a year. Never had any real bother with it during that time. As you say it wasn't any worse than its contemporaries.

Still a close run thing between that and his modern Proton Gen for his worst car though.

 

[Cletus Van Damme]

A racing green 1974 "N" reg Lada 1200 (JAO 76N) for embarrasment. Could not find a pic of a green one.

Although it was pretty reliable, the one I can remember breaking down most and us having to get out as it would not make it up Honister Pass was a 60's Ford Anglia.

 

[Browser]

Ditto the Ladas,though both of my dads were the later Riva model. Bloody terrible things.

 

[Milo]

My step dad had a montego he would not throw away. Thankfully the engine exploded on the M4 thus ending its life.

 

[Panter]

'Tis a thing of beauty though

Feeling old now, I had one of these:

A fiat strada - it was so rusty it was like a colander:

And these...

The Austin Maestro

 

[Panter]

My Dad's worst was probably a Renault 12

Held together with tape and good luck, it wasn't that long ago that it finally disintegrated and had to be scrapped

 

[JtB]

My Dad sold his worst ever car to me and so my worst ever car was also my first car.

See if you can work out what car it was.

One of the first cars ever to get a 5 speed gear box.
Quite often you couldn’t select first gear and so you had to pull away in second gear.
Sometimes you couldn’t select first or second gear and so you had to pull away in third gear
On occasions you couldn’t select first, second or third gear and so you had to pull away in forth gear.
Twice the drive shaft broke and so you couldnt pull away in any gear.
You couldn’t tell the difference between forth gear and reverse – that caused a few ‘brown pants’ moments!

Award yourself 3 points if you already know what car it was.

Had a new type of ‘hydro-gas’ suspension.
When you put the hand brake on the rear of the car lifted up.
When you put the front brake on the front of the car dipped and the car would skid.
When you tried to turn corners the car dipped to the left/right and just carried on in a straight line.
You needed to get the suspension pumped up every 6 months otherwise even small bumps in the road bottomed the suspension.

Award yourself 2 points if you've only just worked out what car it was now.

The car bodywork was badly corroded by the time the car was 6 years old.
The engine mounts got so corroded that they sheared and the engine fell out.
The petrol tank got so corroded that I ended up with petrol swilling around in the boot.
The bonnet flew open on the motorway at 75mph in the outside lane - another 'brown pants' moment!
I heard reports of wheels dropping off (but that one never happened to me).

Award yourself 1 point if you've only just worked out what car it was now.

And finally, it had a square steering wheel – which actually worked quite well (apart from the fact that the car didn't go round corners very well).

No points for guessing now.

 

[Cletus Van Damme]

My Dad sold his worst ever car to me and so my worst ever car was also my first car.

See if you can work out what car it was.

One of the first cars ever to get a 5 speed gear box.
Quite often you couldn’t select first gear and so you had to pull away in second gear.
Sometimes you couldn’t select first or second gear and so you had to pull away in third gear
On occasions you couldn’t select first, second or third gear and so you had to pull away in forth gear.
Twice the drive shaft broke and so you couldnt pull away in any gear.
You couldn’t tell the difference between forth gear and reverse – that caused a few ‘brown pants’ moments!

Award yourself 3 points if you already know what car it was.

Had a new type of ‘hydro-gas’ suspension.
When you put the hand brake on the rear of the car lifted up.
When you put the front brake on the front of the car dipped and the car would skid.
When you tried to turn corners the car dipped to the left/right and just carried on in a straight line.
You needed to get the suspension pumped up every 6 months otherwise even small bumps in the road bottomed the suspension.

Award yourself 2 points if you've only just worked out what car it was now.

The car bodywork was badly corroded by the time the car was 6 years old.
The engine mounts got so corroded that they sheared and the engine fell out.
The petrol tank got so corroded that I ended up with petrol swilling around in the boot.
The bonnet flew open on the motorway at 75mph in the outside lane - another 'brown pants' moment!
I heard reports of wheels dropping off (but that one never happened to me).

Award yourself 1 point if you've only just worked out what car it was now.

And finally, it had a square steering wheel – which actually worked quite well (apart from the fact that the car didn't go round corners very well).

No points for guessing now.

It wasn't an Austin Maxi was it

Edit: I noticed the square steering wheel, I am guessing it was an Allegro. I thought Allegro mean't fast in musical terms, strange name in hindsight for this car. The Vanden Plas model with the Rolls Royce style grill was totally ridiculous.

 

[subaqua]

It wasn't an Austin Maxi was it

Edit: I noticed the square steering wheel, I am guessing it was an Allegro. I thought Allegro mean't fast in musical terms, strange name in hindsight.

ALLEGRO Quartic steering wheel and horrible babypoo yellowybrown paintwork. the Mk3 allegro got jazzed up with metallic paints

 

[swee'pea99]

The Allegro Vanden Plas - a name to rank with Morris Ital.

It's probably apocryphal, but I seem to remember once hearing that the Allegro was the only car ever made that was more aerodynamic going backwards than forwards. Is it true?

 

[subaqua]

Is[/i] it true?

yes, but not by much of the drag coefficient

 

[Tim Bennet.]

A property it shares with most cars of its era and some even now.


The flat area for the radiator, the bumper heights specified for the US market, the flat headlights pointing forward and the windscreen being quite upright in a small car, are all difficult to get aero dynamic, especially if you don't have much money, or see much need, for wind tunnel testing. The back of the car has far less constraints on it's sculpting.

The cars which weren't more aerodynamic going backwards wasn't because the front was any better, but that the back was even worse. VW Passat, any Volvo, etc, etc.

The impetuous for sorting out the aerodynamics didn't come until the battle for better and better mpg had exhausted all the easier options.