What's with the Old Bill nowadays?

[danphoto]

Here's a typical quote, straight off the BBC News site:-

The three boys off the first bus approached them, and one has taken a weapon out of his clothing and stabbed the victim just once in the neck.

When did they start talking like that? "One has taken a weapon ..." ffs.

What's it all about? I'm not even sure what tense it is. Present perfect? Whatever, it's stupid.

 

[mac1]

probably the same time everybody started to say "haitch"

 

[vernon]

Here's a typical quote, straight off the BBC News site:-



When did they start talking like that? "One has taken a weapon ..." ffs.

What's it all about? I'm not even sure what tense it is. Present perfect? Whatever, it's stupid.

What is the correct version?

 

[danphoto]

What is the correct version?

That's actually quite correct as far as the English goes, but my problem is with the use of that tense in this context. At one time, a talking head copper would have said what anybody else would, which is "one took a weapon".

 

[Red Light]

Its an improvement over the old style Copperspeak:

The three suspects were alighting from the first omnibus when they approached the victim. One of the suspects then proceeded to withdraw a weapon from within his clothing...........

 

[Archie_tect]

...hit was hat this point in the proceedings when I haspied the young fella-me-lad then commence puncturing said victim several times habout 'is person. Whereupon I hattempted to prevent the hassaillant from causing further grevious bodily 'arm, m'lud.

 

[Fnaar]

They should clip that youngster's ear, and make him give the apples back.
the present perfect... it's annoying... as also used by footballers when talking post match about events.

 

[Dayvo]

...hit was hat this point in the proceedings when I haspied the young fella-me-lad then commence puncturing said victim several times habout 'is person. Whereupon I hattempted to prevent the hassaillant from causing further grevious bodily 'arm, m'lud.

Years ago, at my first job, there was a gateman who got confused with his 'H's. He would often make a call over the tannoy system for Handrew Arley to contact him.

Quite a few of my old mates back home are coppers and have 'developed' their police-talk. It's funny to hear them talking socially as it's become natural for them to speak like this:

The subject was observed entering the a fore mentioned entry way. Documented to be breached around 1300 hours, the door was found to be, uh, dislodged with an unidentified object. The perp. was reportedly seen grasping that device by a reliable witness blah, blah, blah...... - taken from Urban Dictionaries, 'cop-speak'

Move along now, nothing to see here....

 

[Red Light]

the present perfect... it's annoying...

So does that make it the present imperfect?

 

[swee'pea99]

...hit was hat this point in the proceedings when I haspied the young fella-me-lad then commence puncturing said victim several times habout 'is person. Whereupon I hattempted to prevent the hassaillant from causing further grevious bodily 'arm, m'lud.

Hexcellent!

 

[Headgardener]

Years ago, at my first job, there was a gateman who got confused with his 'H's. He would often make a call over the tannoy system for Handrew Arley to contact him.

Quite a few of my old mates back home are coppers and have 'developed' their police-talk. It's funny to hear them talking socially as it's become natural for them to speak like this:

The subject was observed entering the a fore mentioned entry way. Documented to be breached around 1300 hours, the door was found to be, uh, dislodged with an unidentified object. The perp. was reportedly seen grasping that device by a reliable witness blah, blah, blah...... - taken from Urban Dictionaries, 'cop-speak'

Move along now, nothing to see here....

How do you "grasp something by a reliable witness"? Is it some kind of hand tool?

 

[Archie_tect]

Moving swiftly on....

 

[buddha]

When did they start talking like that? "One has taken a weapon ..." ffs.

Sounds like the Queen's English to me. Or someone posh