Where were they all? Disappointment (and irony)

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LabRatt

Senior Member
Location
Sarf lundin
I've not posted in a while, not that anyone'll've missed me. I'm still not riding, though I'm managing to do my bit on youtube now.
That's not what I'm talking about though.

I was on a course in London last week. This involved me getting a train to London Bridge and walking from there to Liverpool Street. It was quite a good course (server virtualisation with Microsoft Hyper-V 2008 if you care) but a disappointing walk.

Where were all the silly cyclists jumping red lights and running down pedestrians?
Where were all the reckless and dangerous drivers mowing down cyclists left, right and centre?

Nowhere. Every cyclist was considerate (though many lidless and several podded) and stopped at red lights. The drivers were as polite and unselfish as you expect the average driver in London to be. Everything was fine and I didn't get a chance to shout in righteous indignation at a RLJing fakenger trying to mow me down. Just felt that there being nothing worthy of comment was itself worth commenting on. Despite what we see on youtube (and hear here) most of the time nothing happens. People get from P to Q, whatever their transport, without incident.

On the other hand, using the pavements is a different experience. Pedestrians don't give way, they don't shoulder check, they stop suddenly for no apparent reason and they do their best to blind you with enormous umbrellas. Bloody tax dodgers - they should get a car! :thumbsup:

The irony part, unrelated to the rest of it: I've said before that my GF is very uncomfortable with the idea of me riding a bike - that's why I'm still not doing it. On my second day I realised that I could pop round the corner and take a Boris bike back to (near) the station. Then I decided that if I did that I'd have to tell her about my experience, and then that she'd get angry. Instead I walked 15-20 minutes each way in boots that are near the end of their life and hurt my feet over long distances, and in heavy rain for about half the week.

My GF would rather I have guaranteed pain and discomfort from my boots and the rain than a small chance of having an accident and a small chance of that accident being serious. That's the irony. I don't resent her for it, I understand she worries, but I don't know how to point it out to her.
 
I am new to cylcing and was surprised how safe and considerate most are.

I now see that being scared was unjustified but I'm now surpised to hear a man be so scared of his girlfiend!!
 
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LabRatt

Senior Member
Location
Sarf lundin
I'm now surpised to hear a man be so scared of his girlfiend!!

Fear on my part has nothing to do with it. There's a back-story, some of which has been covered on these very boards and the rest isn't available for discussion.
Is the missing R a typo, or are you trying to say something? :whistle:
 

wheres_my_beard

Über Member
Location
Norwich
My GF would rather I have guaranteed pain and discomfort from my boots and the rain than a small chance of having an accident and a small chance of that accident being serious. That's the irony. I don't resent her for it, I understand she worries, but I don't know how to point it out to her.

Make her walk a mile in your boots (probably a circular walk), then ask her to ride a mile on your bike (possibly the same route she walked); let her see both sides of the coin. If there is one.

As with any aspect of life, only the sensational gets talked about and maginified. There must be millions of uneventful journeys every single day, but no one talks about them. They would make very dull youtube viewing.

Maybe point out to your GF how many people don't get injured everyday, by anything, and she may feel more assured. Or patronised.

You need to choose one from the following -

a) New boots

b) New girlfriend

c) New bike

:whistle:

All of the above?

Only joking.

Just b and c.
 
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LabRatt

Senior Member
Location
Sarf lundin
Make her walk a mile in your boots (probably a circular walk), then ask her to ride a mile on your bike (possibly the same route she walked); let her see both sides of the coin. If there is one.

That'd never work - I'm 5 foot 7-and-a-half-ish with clown feet, and she's five nothing with tiny pretty feet. The problem is the notion that an accident, however unlikely, could kill me. I've pointed out that, (iirc) mile-for-mile, pedestrians are more likely to be injured, and that you'll rarely hear of someone trapped in a burning bicycle, and she can accept the rational logic there. Psychologically speaking though, the more serious the consequences could be, the more likely those consequences seem.

And there's the fact of her brother's accident. He wasn't wearing a helmet, and the brain trauma and memory loss means we'll never know exactly what happened. It might help to know the taxi hit him because he was being a pillock as 15 year old boys can be, if that was the case, or it might not, but it's moot. She's terrified of seeing me in a coma like she did him. Or seeing me dead.

I understand that.
 

fimm

Veteran
Location
Edinburgh
I don't think LabRatt is scared of his girlfriend. I think he knows that she would be upset if he rode a bike (because she believes it to be very dangerous) and so he didn't because he does not want to upset her.

Edited to add that I posted that before I saw LabRatt's brief explanation of the back story.
 

Cheddar George

oober member
OK, new boots it is.

You've decided that shes the one, for better or for worse (horrible phrase - can't think of a better one). It sounds like you have made every argument that has or will be suggested here on the forum and it will not change the situation. Hopefully over time she may become a little less fearful but short term it looks like more comfy foot wear is the order of the day.

For what it's worth if i was in this position with my other half then the bikes would probably go ..... she is indeed my other half.

Good luck. :thumbsup:
 

gaz

Cycle Camera TV
Location
South Croydon
Looking at what is posted here and what is posted on youtube is just one side of the coin.
As they say, bad press travels 7x faster than good press. The bad stuff sticks in the mind and is what comes back to memory.

I personally pass and get passed by several hundred vehicles a day if i commute and out of all of those i may see 2 silly cyclists and 2 dangerous drivers. looking at it as a whole, it's pretty good.
 
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LabRatt

Senior Member
Location
Sarf lundin
Gaz, I usually refer to you and Mikey as examples of just how safe it really is, pointing out that the vast majority of youtube-worthy material doesn't involve an actual direct threat, even if that is usually down do the actions of the cyclist in avoiding it.

Obviously, I've not mentioned you recently...
 

GrasB

Veteran
Location
Nr Cambridge
I think one of the things you have to remember is how many interactions you have on the road as a cyclist & how far the likes of Gaz & Mikey are traveling. I've ridden almost 7400 miles already this year but the number of incidents I've had that I've felt really threatened I can count on my fingers.
 
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