Absurdly poor piece on bike theft in local paper..

wafter

Über Member
Location
Oxford
Courtesy of the Oxford Mail:

Oxford Mail said:
STOLEN bikes could have been chucked over the railings in Abingdon.

At the weekend one person said they watched a man pick up a bike and lob it, before making a getaway.

Appealing to anybody who had their bike stolen on Facebook, one person wrote on the Spotted:Abingdon page: "Found a bike in the south area, saw a man throw it over some railings and walk off.

"If anybody is missing a bike, or has had one stolen comment on this post and I will drop you a message, I've put it in my garage so you can come and collect it at some point."

The post had nearly 40 comments with 17 people desperatley posting descriptions of their missing bikes in the hopes to be reunited.

In May this year, the latest crime data available, there were five reports of bike thefts to the police in Abingdon.

In April, there were seven and the numbers were similar to reports made last year and the previous year too.

Of the five made in May, one is still under investigation.

In two cases, one incident on Ock Street and another at Waitrose, police were unable to identify who the suspect was so the investigation was closed.

In the other two cases, one on Oxford Road and the other on St Helen Street, police were unable to prosecute the suspect.

To report a bike theft call police on 101 or make a report online.
Granted the standard of journalism in local papers has been in the gutter for years and apparently only gets worse, however I'm left almost speechless by the grammatical shortcomings of this somewhat cryptic piece's opening salvo, as well as the fact that it's been live for three days without revision / removal and only has one critical comment.

Am I alone in thinking that this looks like it's been written after two bottles of wine and repeated blows to the head? :wacko:
 

Brandane

Is it because I lied when I was 17?
Location
Costa Clyde.
How does one steal a bike on FaceBook? :scratch:
 
OP
wafter

wafter

Über Member
Location
Oxford
I'm more concerned by the contextually-lacking "chucked over the railings" comment - is "the railings" a single site of particular significance in Abingdon? maybe they only have one set of railings in the whole town... or perhaps "chucked over the railings" is a euphamism for something?
 

HMS_Dave

Über Member
Location
Midlands
"Appealing to anybody who had their bike stolen on Facebook, one person wrote on the Spotted:Abingdon page: "Found a bike in the south area, saw a man throw it over some railings and walk off. "

Clearly, the man was sick and tired of his chain falling off so instead of throwing it into the canal like any other self respecting yooman being, he inconsiderately littered what is presumably a grassy verge or ditch of some variety...

Some people.

Oh and the article is complete rubbish....
 

lane

Über Member
There was a piece in our local paper a school closed due to covid. They appeared to have interviewed one person only. He said he was not concerned his children were not school age and when they were they did not go to that school. I thought could they have interviewed someone a bit more relevant to the story.
 

swee'pea99

Legendary Member
There was a piece in our local paper a school closed due to covid. They appeared to have interviewed one person only. He said he was not concerned his children were not school age and when they were they did not go to that school. I thought could they have interviewed someone a bit more relevant to the story.
That's hilarious!
 
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