Airport security people - rant!

[Dan B]

Jimi Hendrix was a Marshall arts expert. Your interactions with stewardesses might be better described as (extra-)marital arts ;-)

 

[Chuffy]

Funny? I'm not sure. I find them pathetic in their self-righteous, bossy, jobsworth manner. Pathetic because they have been trained to respond in a standardised way that does not allow for individual thought or initiative. The crowd at Manchester never strike me as very brainy but then you don't really need brains if you're indoctrinated to such a level.

Hmmm, hands up everyone who fancies a job being sneered at by pompous know-alls? For minimum wage you too can spend a day being abused by self-important gobsh!tes!

I'm always polite to them when I fly, because god knows it's a crappy job and I'm glad I'm not doing it.

 

[wafflycat]

Absolutely. In fact, I could do it single handed as I am a marshall arts expert and could easily take over an aeroplane. Being an RAF trained pilot, I could also fly one as well and as I am also a paratrooper, I could bail out if things went wrong. As it is though, I'm more a lover than a fighter and so content myself with pleasing all the stewardesses and recruiting them into the mile-high club. Which I think is rather gallant of me. Not that I like to boast or owt.

Or do I mean "martial"? Always get that one wrong.

'marital arts' sound much more descriptive if you say you are a more of a lover than a fighter

 

[Brains]

I used to do a great deal of international plane travel, an average of 250,000 miles a year. I go into 'switch off, sheep mode' when in airports.

I have also for the last 20 years made a point of never buying anything in airports, as I object to being ripped off, even when it was not my money.

I also never use airport taxis for the same reason.

The company I used to work for eventually came up with a policy of refusing to reimburse any airport expenses unless a flight was delayed by more than 2 hours.

 

[GilesM]

The security staff are a wee bit too jobsworthy to be considered pleasant people, but they do have to follow the most stupid rules, which are made up by the most stupid people. The Liquids one has to be the biggest load of old bollocks known to man, I think the proof of this is that when flying out of Israel (the most strict airport security anywhere) they don't have this nonsense law.

 

[PaulB]

The Liquids one has to be the biggest load of old bollocks known to man, I think the proof of this is that when flying out of Israel (the most strict airport security anywhere) they don't have this nonsense law.

I wasn't aware of that and it should surprise me and it saddens me that it doesn't! You're spot on; that liquids scam is a load of old bollocks and proof that the terrorists have won an important victory in that they've got us all adhering to petty, childish and meaningless rules made up by peanuts.

 

[Chuffy]

I wasn't aware of that and it should surprise me and it saddens me that it doesn't! You're spot on; that liquids scam is a load of old bollocks and proof that the terrorists have won an important victory in that they've got us all adhering to petty, childish and meaningless rules made up by peanuts.

I believe that Al-Quaida have that exact motto on a batch of club t-shirts.
'Important victory' my arse...

 

[ComedyPilot]

The 'no-liquids' policy only affects you if you drink, or buy from them. I don't feel the need to get tanked up to fly, and won't buy from the airlines/duty free out of principle. I don't get a skin full going by train or bus, so don't need it on a plane. Also, my holidays are lifetime experiences, not just a way of funding an airline due to my alcohol dependency/can only have a good time with a beer on board.

 

[zimzum42]

I wouldn't mind not having to pay £2 for a bottle of water though. I never drink alcohol on flights....

 

[Globalti]

The judge in the awful Baby P case criticised the social workers for not using their "critical faculties" but social workers, airport security workers, teachers and others in positions important to public safety have had this power removed from them and every possible decision or judgement replaced by a written "procedure".

However as we see from numerous high profile cases in every area of public life, procedures actually do not prevent disasters like the Baby P case and procedures wouldn't prevent a determined and resourceful hijacker.

 

[GilesM]

The 'no-liquids' policy only affects you if you drink, or buy from them. I don't feel the need to get tanked up to fly, and won't buy from the airlines/duty free out of principle.

I don't usually get tanked up on my shower gel, toothpaste, shaving foam or anti me smelling stuff. What absolute fcukwit decided that 100ml of shower gel is fine, but 125ml clearly marks you out as religious nutter on a mission, and the best yet was two weeks ago at Munich airport, they we selling the little plastic bags that they have decided you need for your liquids, 2euros from a vending machine.

 

[GilesM]

The judge in the awful Baby P case criticised the social workers for not using their "critical faculties" but social workers, airport security workers, teachers and others in positions important to public safety have had this power removed from them and every possible decision or judgement replaced by a written "procedure".

However as we see from numerous high profile cases in every area of public life, procedures actually do not prevent disasters like the Baby P case and procedures wouldn't prevent a determined and resourceful hijacker.

Exactly right, and if the determind and resourceful hijacker takes down a plane, a group of very clever important people will sit around a table and make up a new procedure.

 

[PaulB]

and the best yet was two weeks ago at Munich airport, they we selling the little plastic bags that they have decided you need for your liquids, 2euros from a vending machine.

Both Manchester and Leeds airports have these vending machines now that dispense two placcy bags for a quid! And they have, get this, "regulation size" bags now, presumably to stop you taking your own! Are there no depths to which they will not sink in the drive to fleece the public?

 

[GilesM]

Both Manchester and Leeds airports have these vending machines now that dispense two placcy bags for a quid! And they have, get this, "regulation size" bags now, presumably to stop you taking your own! Are there no depths to which they will not sink in the drive to fleece the public?

I'll have to nick a load at Edinburgh while they are still free there.